THINGS 
THE LORD 
HAS 
SHOWN ME
Book 2

A Book of Remembrance
of 
God’s guidance and promises

From revelations, dreams,
visions, impressions,
and experiences

Joan Whitacre Royer

DEDICATION

I dedicate this book to the Lord Jesus Christ,
my best Friend.
May it bring Him glory
in the lives of others as they read it.

SPECIAL THANKS

A special thank you to my daughter, Beth,
for inviting me to stay in her lovely quiet home
during the months of writing this book,
for letting me use her computer and printer,
for putting this book on the internet,
and for being such encouraging company.
Thanks, Beth!

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

The author, Joan (“Jo Ann”) Royer, was involved in discipling others through the Discipleship Training program at a Southern Baptist Church in Columbia, Missouri, for 18 years. Then the Lord guided her to take a break from that and spend much time developing an even stronger and more intimate relationship with Him in her quiet times. During that time she worked full time as secretary at a United Methodist Church in Columbia. 

After four years of developing this closer relationship, He lead her to begin writing her first book, Thoughts and Stories: On a Life God Leads, Guides, and Protects. He even gave her the title for the book and gradually, as she listened and wrote, He led her in writing the whole book. Previous to this writing she had collected stories about ways God had impacted the lives of people. This was in response to His guidance from Psalm 96:3 that says: “Declare his glory among the nations, his marvelous deeds among all peoples.” She knew He wanted her to declare His Marvelous Deeds and share those deeds with others by writing them. All this came together in that first book and continued in Thoughts and Stories, Books 2,3,4, and 5.

In 2005 the Lord led her to begin a new series of books under the title: Things The Lord Has Shown Me. That series focused on what the Lord had shown her through revelations, dreams, visions, impressions and experiences. Book 1 of the series contained things shown her through the end of March 2005. This book, book 2 of that series, contains things shown her from April 2005 on. 

She retired from her secretarial position in 2004 and now lives in Lee’s Summit, Missouri, where the Lord has led her to set apart her days to listen to Him and write what He shows her. She has a background in writing from childhood on, has a Bachelor’s Degree in Music and English, and a Master’s Degree in Education. Writing is her passion and the way God is leading her to share with others what God has been doing in her life. Her desire is to encourage and mentor others--as many in the Body of Christ have taught and mentored her through their writings.

INTRODUCTION

“You are my witnesses,” declares the Lord, “that I am God.” (Isaiah 43:12)

On December 31, 2004 in my Quiet Time with the Lord, He began to show me a new project He wanted me to begin in 2005. It was to be a book called Things The Lord Has Shown Me. This book would contain insights, visions, dreams, wisdom, and knowledge given by the Lord to me over my lifetime. 

I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you. (Psalm 32:8)

These would be things the Lord wanted to put into print for others to read at strategic times in their lives. But they also would be used to help me review and understand the revelations He had shown me through these experiences. Therefore it was subtitled A Book of Remembrance. That first book would cover information gleaned from my life journals previous to April 2005 when that book was finished.

After finishing that book Things The Lord Has Shown Me, Book 1, He guided me to write a second book in that series beginning in April 2005. Therefore this book continues on after book one but most of the material in this book happens from April 2005 on.

This book will describe visions, dreams, impressions, and revelations I’ve had as well as prophetic words given to me by others, and tell what the Lord has shown me through them. These revelations are about the Lord, about me, about the world, about the church, and about relationships. 

The Sovereign Lord has given me an instructed tongue, to know the word that sustains the weary. He wakens me morning by morning, wakens my ear to listen like one being taught. ( Isaiah 50:4)

(Writings in italics show what the Holy Spirit spoke to me about that revelation.)

THINGS THE LORD HAS SHOWN ME 
BOOK 2

JOURNAL 4-1-05 Friday

A DREAM ABOUT NEEDING NEW BAKING PANS FOR OVEN
* * * * * * * *

1. I was in a house trying to put different sized baking pans into the small oven in that house. The round pizza sized pan and the rectangular cookie sheet sized pans were too large to fit. I thought I would need to buy new baking pans that would fit.

2. I wrote down things I was taught. In a different font I wrote instructions I was to do.

Baking pans remind me of the new ones Beth and I bought a friend for a recent wedding shower. They were small in size, flexible, and bright blue...very different than the older ones I used to use which were larger, stiff, and metal. The old ones in this dream didn’t fit into the small space for the oven. Since the oven represents or symbolizes the heart, perhaps this dream is telling me that I need new flexible, smaller, prettier things to fit into my heart now. Pans represent a vessel or person, doctrine or tradition, so this could refer to my needing a change in me and my doctrines so that my heart is ready to receive what the Lord wants for me. I pray for that.

The second part of the dream seems to refer to my writing instructions and things I am being taught--and doing that in different fonts so they can be distinguished from each other. That seems to fit this very book which I am writing now. I write the things I am taught in Times New Roman regular font, and I write what the Spirit says to me in the same script but with italics to set it off from the teaching.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I need to be changed to a different vessel with different doctrines and traditions to have my heart fit what He wants to do in it. He is doing that even now at CTC, my church.

JOURNAL 4-2-05 Saturday

A DREAM ABOUT KITTENS IN THE BACK YARD
* * * * * * * *

I was upstairs in a house, perhaps my childhood home, and I looked out the window into the back yard. There I saw a cat (seemed like she might have been our cat) and there were 3 or 4 little kittens out there with her in the yard. I was surprised to see them.

As I prayed about what this dream meant, the Holy Spirit showed me this:

Cats are animals you generally like and are drawn to, right? You like them. And especially kittens you like. So these kittens you have been seeing in dreams are representing something precious to you in the early stages of growth. This is a revelation of precious things growing inside you and in your relations to others that you delight in and are happy about, pleased with. Three kittens may represent conformity and obedience to Me. Four kittens may represent ruling and reigning with Me. You are upstairs so you are seeing this from a spiritual perspective. They are in the back yard so they represent things in your past that are happening now in relation to your past - like to the inner child in you. It’s like what Jack Frost is talking about in the cassette tape - about being healed from distrust toward your parents and, consequently, toward your Heavenly Father. You are beginning (young kittens) to trust Him more and grow beyond the unbelief (mistrust) you have sensed inside you. It’s happening, and it is good growth and what you want.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is there is something precious growing inside me and in my relations to others, something that I delight in. This is in conformity and obedience to Him and also represents ruling and reigning with Him. He’s leading me to trust Him more and grow beyond unbelief.

JOURNAL 4-3-05 Sunday

A DREAM ABOUT PICKING UP LITTER IN THE FRONT YARD
* * * * * * * *

I was picking up litter in the front yard and putting it in a bag to throw away. I saw lots of eye glasses and picked them up. I also found one knife, like a butcher knife, and put it in the bag to throw away also. I gave the littler bag to someone to dispose of the stuff carefully due to the knife. It almost seemed like the person was the treasurer where I used to work.

So I was throwing away stuff I found in the future or present. The things were eye glasses which are useful for seeing, and a knife which refers to words, revelation, or truth. This could mean I am not using helps for seeing and knowing truth. It also could mean my eyes would be healed and I no longer would need eye glasses, and maybe no longer need a knife which might refer to surgery. The Holy Spirit said:

In the future you will not need eyeglasses. You will be healed; your eyes will not need glasses anymore. The knife shows you that you will never need surgery again. All the eyeglasses and knives you ever needed for health and vision will be given to the “treasurer” up in heaven as a testimony to My healing work in you. The knife also represents revelation I have given you that is given to the “treasurer” also to be deposited in heaven on your heavenly record showing My work in you in the future (after now)

v
What the Lord has shown me here is He is doing a healing work in me so that I will no longer need eye glasses or need to have surgery any more. These are deposited in heaven to the treasurer there as a record showing His work in me in the future.

JOURNAL 4-4-05 Monday

A DREAM ABOUT WHITE EASTER BUNNIES JUMPING
* * * * * * * *

I was teaching white tall Easter bunnies to jump straight up and down on their hind feet (they stood on their hind feet; that’s what I mean by Easter bunnies), rather like jumping on a trampoline only it was on the floor, until they jumped higher and higher. They would be doing this as a performance before people. When they got up really high, then they were to do something with their heads, like maybe turn them or something. I was teaching them by jumping and they were copying me. The bunnies were almost as tall as I am.

Yes, they do refer to Christians, new Christians, and you will be teaching them through your books,  teaching them to go higher in their spiritual journey, in their seeking Me. When they get to the highest level they can jump, then the position of their heads will change. These are the pure children you will nurture.

I will do it through your books. You are doing all this writing for Me, and I will use it to My glory and for My work in others. You want to be of use and benefit to others, and you will be, but it will be My work to bring it about.

Remember those spiral notebooks you saw in the middle drawer of the white desk? Well, those represent the spiral bound books you are writing now.

In the next part of this dream we were watching what the Lord was doing and making it large font, big and bold, in our written report.

This represents watching Me and listening to Me and writing what I tell you to write -- and making it clear and plain to others in your books.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that He will use my books to teach other Christians to go higher in their spiritual journey. It will be like big and bold print to them.

JOURNAL 4-5-05 Tuesday

PICTURE OF WOMAN HOLDING BABY
* * * * * * * *

I saw a woman holding a baby in her right arm and trying to open a door (with a pushbar on the door like at Crossroads mall) with her left hand. The baby squirmed and twisted awhile, then quieted and quit twisting.

You are the woman, and you have something with you that you are carrying. It is squirming like it wants to get down and walk or move itself. You are holding it until it is quiet and willing to be carried through the door that you are opening. That door is your writing in a book what you are carrying. That door is ready for you to open and go through now...the door of Things The Lord Has Shown Me (book 2) in the present and future. Begin that book with this week’s dreams and writings from Me.

All up to now has been preparation for now. Mark the THINGS THE LORD HAS SHOWN ME book “up to 4-1-05.” Start a new book “after 4-1-05 with the same format. This will be THINGS THE LORD HAS SHOWN ME, BOOK 2. In it mix up visions, dreams, impressions, etc. and do it chronologically with dates. Start with April 1 dream. 

This is the culmination book(s) of all the writing you have done so far. It will be used to minister to others too, even more than the previous books will be. They will all be important and will all be recorded in heaven in your written account of your life and work for Me. You have given up all to write for Me, so it has eternal value for you and for others too. All to My glory, because My glory is in you and I am leading you and writing through you. Know this each day.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I am “carrying” a new book(s) that is eager to go forward. I am opening the door for the book(s) as I sit to write each day. This picture shows that starting.

JOURNAL 4-8-05 Friday

INSTRUCTIONS TO FOLLOW DAILY
* * * * * * * *

I want you to take time each morning to come to Me. Stop, be quiet, sit, focus on Me, and tell Me that you’re here, you’re listening, you’re waiting on Me. It might only be a few minutes or it might be a soaking time, but focus on Me and get connected with Me EACH MORNING. Then I will be in position to guide you that day. Do you want that? 

v
What the Lord has shown me here is He wants me to take time each morning to get connected with Him. Then I will be in position for Him to guide me that day.

JOURNAL 4-9-05 Saturday

A DREAM ABOUT TEACHING DIFFERENT STYLES OF PRESENTATIONS
* * * * * * * *

I was teaching a group of students in college who were soon going to graduate. I was teaching them different styles or ways of presenting material in an oral report. One student I had give a report where he had lots of sheets of factual material with him when giving the report, and he could pull out the information needed and show and tell about each piece. Another student could do an intricate outline form going from the larger topic and breaking it down into subtopics. Each student was to give one of the different styles of reports so they could all learn the different styles over the course time. They would be graded over how they did. I had a list of all the different styles of reports I wanted them to experience, and assigned them so they could all be covered before the end of the class.

There are different styles of presentations, and you can teach them through your books. Students are people who are still learning, no matter how close to the “end of the class” (the Rapture or their death) they are. They can learn different approaches to relating to God from different people who teach how they relate to Him -- and can learn from each unique way. You will teach your way of relating to Me through your books you write, and others can learn from them. Oral reports involve the spoken word, and there are different ways to speak forth the word...but they all do it in some form, depending on what they want to communicate.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I will teach others through my books about my style of relating to the Lord, and that there are many different styles of relating to Him. Each style is important to know and understand and learn from. Then we will speak forth what we have learned to others.

JOURNAL 4-10-05 Sunday

A DREAM ABOUT MY CLOSE RELATIONSHIP WITH JESUS, AND ABOUT DISCIPLING AND COUNSELING OTHERS WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT’S GUIDANCE
* * * * * * * *

My husband and I were having a time of closeness and I was concerned our children would come home and find us.  It seems like we were at my childhood home.

My husband may refer to Jesus, who is now my husband since I am the Bride of Christ. We were having a close intimate relationship in this dream, a very private one just between the two of us. I seemed concerned about letting others see that relationship. Perhaps this shows my concern about showing this relationship in my books.

Some of us were looking at garden plants (which were coming up in our garden) to see if they were growing and what the plants were. One plant had almost mature beans on it. Others I didn’t recognize, but I was trying to figure out what they were. We were wondering if it was worth doing a garden.

I was looking at the results of all the work I had been doing in preparing and planting a garden of work/ministry. I was trying to see what had grown there. I did recognize some beans growing on a plant, but saw lots of other plants I didn’t recognize. They were growing or starting to grow, but were not yet recognizable to me as to what they were. This may represent all the work I am doing on the books (and/or all the work I did in Discipleship Training for 18 years) and I am wondering if the product is worth all the work and should be continued.

I thought I might get an appointment for a medical checkup and talked to a lady about coming between noon to mid-afternoon (perhaps on Saturday). She wanted me to come in around 5:30 at the end of the time to see patients and I didn’t want to come in that late. 

This seems to refer to my making arrangements to get a spiritual or physical health checkup by the Holy Spirit now during the end portion of my life on earth. 

I was at a medical facility. I told a boy to wait in that room for his friend to get there, that he shouldn’t wander around because he might get lost, there were so many hallways and rooms.

I was counseling a child I cared about to wait for his friend, Jesus, to come to him and help him find his way through this facility where they cared for people and brought healing to them. This might even refer to my daughters (children I care about) and encouraging them to wait for Jesus to help them get the care they need.

I was asked to take one lady, whom I didn’t know, to her home on my way home. It seemed like she was involved in some kind of theater production as maybe a singer.

This may refer to the Holy Spirit as a singer, or myself as representing Him. I was asked to take her with me on my way home, referring to my heart/identity (or it might refer to heaven, my final home). I am to take the Holy Spirit, the singer, with me in my journey home, meaning from now on until I leave the earth.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I have an intimate relationship with Him and that I am learning about my own spiritual health, and helping others find spiritual health -- with the guidance of the Holy Spirit.

JOURNAL 4-11-05 Monday

A DREAM OF THE BODY OF CHRIST LEARNING TO BE IN UNITY AND HARMONY
* * * * * * * *

In this dream I was with a group of people who were being taught to sing a song together. We didn’t have any copies of music for us to look at except one which looked like a newspaper in size and shape. I couldn’t quickly find the notes I was to sing and see them. It was hard to find the music which was printed somewhere in the midst of the front page of the newspaper. I was trying to sing the “in between” notes in a three part harmony. Maybe it was B who was holding the newspaper for me to look at with him.

The director was trying to get us to sing with finely pronounced words, and I told him first we needed to find out what our notes were. I wanted him to help us fine-tune the words, etc., but first we had to find out what the notes were in order to sing. I was kind of amazed that I would tell the director so freely what I felt, but I couldn’t sing unless I had the notes to sing.

He said there were now sheet music copies for individuals which could be bought at the bookstore for $1.00 each. I told him that one week previously I had tried to order individual sheet music for the group and that the bookstore person said she didn’t have any, and I thought she implied or said that she wouldn’t order any for me.

Then I saw all of us men and women just sitting and standing around a table talking and laughing and having a good time together. I thought to myself: “See, I can socialize and have a good time with others.”

The group of us were singers - those who followed the Holy Spirit’s directing. B is an example of this for me. We are announcing and prophesying important events. We are worshiping God from our hearts. We are working to come into harmony and each find our specific notes to sing. I am looking for my niche in between others. I am looking for my place in the Body of Christ. We needed our individual music sheets which could be gotten with new power or spiritual riches. This all brought about an end result of communion and fellowship together.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is a picture of His Body learning to sing in harmony and unity together and buying new music which is first in importance for us. I am trying to find my place in this harmony structure in the Body of Christ.

JOURNAL 4-11-05 Monday

REVELATION ABOUT JESUS BEING THE REAL WATER NEEDED TO QUENCH THIRST
* * * * * * * *

I am the water of life. You are playing the CD “Come To The Waters” and I am the “waters” that you need to quench your thirst for Me. Did you know you thirst for Me? You may not recognize that as thirst, but there is something inside you that is longing for Me, and it is like a thirst. Nothing can quench it but the real water. I am that real water, and I fill you with My Presence and quench that thirst.

And when I fill you with My water I also fill you with My love. It is all part of Me, of who I am. I am all these things and more. I am all you will ever need -- for anything. I will favor you with My Presence the rest of your life on this earth. You will NEVER be without My Presence.

Now you are soaking in My Presence as you wait before Me to hear Me and see Me. You will see Me, as well as hear Me. I know you want to.

I have lots of things to say to you now that we are starting your new book “Things The Lord Has Shown Me, Book 2” in which you write all current and future things I show you and tell you. You are going to enjoy and like doing this, I know. Do not be afraid you will not hear or see Me right...just because it is future. I know it is hard for you to write things I show you about the future because you think they might not happen. Remember that sometimes I show you things so that you will pray and they will be changed, and therefore, they will not happen as I told you.

I have lots to say to you. Wait before Me now, then write.

Remember I was communicating with My Father all the time while I was on the earth. During My ministry years He and I communicated ALL THE TIME. Sometimes He would show Me what He was doing during My prayer time away from the others, especially during the early morning hours. I was like you; the early morning hours were good ones for Me. But I also was communicating with My Father all during the day, seeing things He was showing Me, and listening to things He was telling Me. That’s how I could say that I always did what the Father showed Me and spoke what He spoke to Me.

That’s what I want your life to be like now, like I was when on the earth. I will show you things and speak to you. Then I want you to communicate that to others as I lead you -- sometimes writing, and sometimes speaking. Will you say yes to doing this?

Do not fear; I will be with you and I will enable you to do it all. Remember, I am your “all in all.”

JOURNAL 4-12-05 Tuesday

A DREAM ABOUT A GIRL SINGING WITH REVELATION AND COVERING
* * * * * * * *

A group of us were preparing to go to some conference/meeting. I was helping a girl who was to sing a solo which told of the main theme of the meeting, so it was important to hear it. She was to have this house box-like structure with windows in it held in front of her when she sang, so I was going to hold it. She was to hold a top over herself while she sang. We were practicing doing all this and trying to get all the details worked out. It was like I was instructing her about the importance of getting the message clearly across in her song.

We were happy when it became evident that more and more people were making commitments to come to the conference. It seemed like they were young people.

I was helping a girl get ready to sing a solo, to worship God, which was the main theme of our meeting/gathering. I held this structure in front of her. The structure might be our family relationship (could be home or could be church family) and it had revelation in it. It was happening now or in the future. She had protection/covering over her mind and thoughts.  People sitting in front of us were choosing to follow Christ and join the spiritual journey with us. These were people new in the faith.

v
What the Lord has shown me through this is that a girl is getting ready to worship God and she will have covering over her mind and thoughts. This will come through our family relationship and she will receive revelation and understanding. Many will come to the Lord and commit to follow Him as new believers and join us on the spiritual journey.

JOURNAL 4-12-05 Tuesday

REVELATION ABOUT BEING IN THE 7TH 1000 YEAR PERIOD NOW
* * * * * * * *

You’re in the 7th day (millenium) now...the day of rest from work...the day when I will do it all and you will rest from work (that means resting in Me in all that you do). 4,000 years were before I came and 2,000 years were after I came. Now you are in the 7th 1000 years (as a thousand years is like a day unto the Lord). I am doing a powerful work in this 7th day and My people are resting in Me to do it all. I am pouring out My Spirit now, as My Spirit was poured out upon My Son Jesus at His baptism--in fullness. This will happen gradually more and more, in various parts of the world, just as you saw in your vision of that, until the Rapture takes out My Bride. Put the Rapture vision in this writing today:

A VISION OF REVIVAL AND THE RAPTURE
* * * * * * * *

In this vision I saw pray-ers kneeling at the front of the sanctuary in front of the platform. I only saw their silhouettes and those silhouettes were aqua blue. They were surrounded by a rose colored light. The four who met in the air (from the previous vision scene-representing discipleship, worship, evangelism, and pastoring) came together  into a ball of fire. This ball started moving around inside the sanctuary in an arc to come down and touch someone, then went up in another arc to some other part of the sanctuary to come down and touch someone else. It kept doing this over and over, faster and faster, touching more and more people. Each time it went in the arc through the air it left a trail of silver dust which stayed, like a jet trail in the sky, so these trails increased and increased within the inside of the sanctuary. It kept going faster and faster until it exploded so the light and silver dust filled everywhere.

Interpretation: This scene represents revival of people by the touch of the Holy Spirit. This touching by the Spirit starts, then increases in number and speed. It involves “the Church” anywhere. It comes through prayer which turns into fire as the Spirit takes those prayers and increases and answers them. The fire is the judgment and cleansing of God. The silver dust is the beauty that is seen in the atmosphere around where the Spirit touches. The explosion of light and silver dust everywhere is a visual picture of the Rapture of God’s saints - in the twinkling of an eye like an explosion, and greatly beautiful like light and silver dust.

v
What the Lord has shown me through this vision includes revival, the Holy Spirit being poured out upon the whole world, and the Rapture experience.

My sanctuary is the world now. The final moments have come for the pouring out of My Spirit upon the sanctuary of the world. It will be happening faster and faster, more and more, touching people here and there, and you will see and hear it all! Rejoice for the day of the Lord’s pouring out His Spirit has come!

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that we are already in the 7th 1000 years, which we call the millenium, and it is a time of our resting from our work and His pouring out His Spirit in complete fullness. (Therefore it seems this time period includes the harvest of the Church, the Rapture of the Bride of Christ, the tribulation, the return of Jesus with His saints to win the final battle, and the renewal of all things under His Lordship for the rest of the millenium period).

JOURNAL 4-13-05 Wednesday

REVELATION ABOUT RESTING IN HIM
* * * * * * * *

Your relationship with Me is one of resting in Me and letting Me do what needs to be done. I want that kind of relationship with you because that is how I am working out the writing I want you to do for Me -- that I want to share with others after the Rapture. You do not need to get the books published as that is My job, and I will do it at the right time. I think you are now ready to accept and recognize that you might not ever see your books published while you are on the earth.

Yes, Lord, that is ok with me if that is the way You want it. (The people who read them will not know me, and perhaps they will receive from the books better by not knowing me.)

It is. You just keep writing what I lead you to write, and I will take care of all the rest, including what I want to do with the books, etc.

Your relationship with Me is resting in Me and waiting on Me -- as you are doing now for your healing, for your provision, and for what to write daily in your books...our books.

Some people are called to be contenders -- like your pastors contend in the heavenlies -- and that is ok. That is what I have called them to do and they are doing that.

But you, I have called you to be a “rester.” By faith resting in Me daily as you wait before Me. Both types of people are what I want. Both are useful and helpful in fulfilling My kingdom work. They pray in one way; you pray in another, but you both are intercessors before Me and for Me.

I will come to you daily and show you and tell you how to rest in Me for that day’s needs and work for Me. Come to Me each morning for this.

JOURNAL 4-14-05 Thursday

AN IMPRESSION ABOUT A BLUE BOWL AND BOTTLE OF WATER
* * * * * * * *

In this picture I saw a bottle of water on the right side tipped up like it was pouring water into a deep blue bowl or wide mouthed cup. The blue color was about the same as Beth’s blue dishes.

If I am the bottle and Beth is the blue bowl, then this is referring to the Spirit being poured from me to her. Perhaps this refers to the Spirit being poured from me into those who receive and read my books. The books may be represented by the blue bowl which show a spiritual container or vessel or person.

This is true also. My Spirit (the water) is being poured from you (the bottle that contains Me) into others who are spiritual containers (people who hear you and see you and read your books). This is a revelation of that situation as I see it right now. Possess this. Know this. It is true. It is happening every day as you write and speak for Me.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that the Holy Spirit is pouring His words from me into those who hear me, see me, and read my books.

JOURNAL 4-14-05 Thursday

A DREAM ABOUT MY HOUSE, MY SECRET PLACE OF DWELLING
* * * * * * * *

In this dream I saw something in front of me on the ground which I believed represented my house. It was 1-layer, round, and seemed to be made of cement or something similar. The 1-layer idea seemed to be significant. When I woke up the clock said 1:11 am.

It seems to indicate my dwelling place (the Secret Place) is stable, sound, established for now and the future. Where I dwell (the Secret Place) is first in importance. The clock time also emphasized three times that this is first in importance.

Yes, this is true. You are now established in your home, your Secret Place, in Me, as your dwelling place. It is first in rank in your life. That is established for now and for your future. Know this is so, that it is true, that it is established. It’s what you and I both want.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I am now established in my dwelling place, my Secret Place of the Most High, and it is first in my life now and in the future.

JOURNAL 4-14-05 Thursday

A DREAM OF WASHING SILVERWARE KNIVES
* * * * * * * *

In this dream there were several areas or deep wash tubs where dishes were going to be washed. I was putting tableware knives into one of the side zip pockets of a large bag, like a large purse or carrying bag, so they could be washed while in the bag. The bag was about 14” long and 12 “ high and seemed to have 2-3 such pockets. Also in this dream I seemed to be making a ham sandwich to eat.

This dream refers to washing/bathing the Word of God/revelations in prayer. It is showing how precious and valuable this is. It also is indicating to eat the Word of God and His work.

This is true. Keep taking the revelations I give you, the truths I show you, and bathe them in prayer as they are precious and valuable for your life and provision and work.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I need to keep praying through His words and His revelations to me as they are precious for my life, provision, and work.

JOURNAL 4-14-05 Thursday

AN IMPRESSION ABOUT SEEING UP AND DOWN MARKS ON A SCREEN
* * * * * * * *

I saw up and down marks moving across like words on a computer screen. Sometimes they pushed other marks ahead of them. ( i.e. IV[[IV]]IMINI[[]]]IIVV[[]] ) (Like a heart monitor line has ups and downs but closer together)

HS said: What is this? (I told Him what I saw)

This is My writing through you. You don’t see what the words are yet, but these marks represent words that will be coming which you don’t yet know. Do you want to know them? Do you want to do this with Me? (I told Him yes)

I am teaching you to listen and write more than ever before. I am teaching you to wait in My presence more than ever before. I am taking you to a new level of communing with Me. We will keep going up, learning more and more, doing more and more together in your life, in your days. This is My plan for you. Is it ok with you?  (Yes, Lord, I want You to take me on to more with You.)

OK, we will go on.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that He is taking me on to more listening to Him and writing with Him. We are going on to a new level of communing together.

JOURNAL 4-14-05 Thursday

REVELATION ABOUT PREVIOUS VISION OF JESUS AND ANGELS
* * * * * * * *

The Holy Spirit reminded me of the previous vision of Jesus and angels which I will put here:

The worship leader was leading us in praise and worship songs and we were singing before God. As I shut my eyes while singing one song, suddenly I “saw” this picture. In the picture Jesus was standing before the congregation holding out His hands in blessing over them. They were all bowing their heads like in prayer before Him. It didn’t seem as if anyone was aware of His presence but me. 

I was standing in the upper left-hand corner of the back part of the room (where I actually was at the time). The meeting area was shaped with the stage down at the front of the room and the seats sloping upward from there, with the highest seats toward the back. I looked at Jesus and He looked at me.  

Then I looked up to my right and saw high up on the right wall of the room three angels holding long trumpets to their mouths. The trumpets were pointed downward toward the people. That was the end of the scene, and I was again aware of the congregation singing the worship song. I was amazed at what had just happened!

Then I opened my eyes and the worship leader lead us in another song. Again, I closed my eyes, and again I suddenly saw the same scene. Jesus was standing in front of the group with His hands out in blessing over them as their heads were bowed. I was standing up in the same spot as before and looking at Jesus. Then I saw the three angels again; but this time they were holding their trumpets in a straight out position. When I opened my eyes again we began singing another song.

This third time I closed my eyes while worshiping and saw the same picture. The only change in the picture was in the position the angels were holding their trumpets. This third time they held the trumpets in an upward position pointed toward the sky. When this happened for the third time I was just stunned by what had happened. I was touched by the vision and was never the same after that. It kept coming into my memory and I pondered what it meant and whether I was to do something about it.

He reminded me that Jesus was in front looking at me and I at Him, and the angels were on my right. He showed me that I was seeing in the spiritual realm as Jesus and I looked at each other, and that I was a “seer.” I was standing up and so was Jesus, but not other people. This was showing the communication between Jesus and me visually. I was to take what I “saw” into the natural world (as the angels were on my right)

				+ Jesus
							+ Angel
							+ Angel
							+ Angel
		+ me
	
v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I am a “seer” seeing Jesus in the spiritual realm. I am to take what I “see” from Him in the spiritual realm into the natural realm through writing it in my books.

JOURNAL 4-14-05 Thursday

REVELATION ABOUT A SHAFT OF LIGHT BETWEEN HEAVEN AND ME
* * * * * * * *

The Holy Spirit gave me the idea of a shaft of light going from myself on earth praying up to Jesus in heaven receiving and sending through that shaft of light (like a portal of light) open between the two of us. I was reminded of reading many years ago about a person praying and his prayers being like a shaft of light going to heaven.

						+  Jesus
						|||
						|||
						|||
						+ Me praying

v
What the Lord has shown me here is when I pray there is a shaft of light transporting that to heaven where it is received by Jesus, and His messages come down to me on it too.

JOURNAL 4-14-05 Thursday

REVELATION ABOUT A SHIRT AND BOLTS OF LIGHTNING
* * * * * * * *

I was shown a picture of a shirt (long sleeved and with a V collar, button down the front) on the left side of the scene and bolts of lightning flashing down from above on the right side of the scene.

This seems to indicate that man’s heart (as to whether it’s righteous or in sin) is going to be revealed with God’s lightning (His power, judgment, and knowledge)

	______			<   >
	|	|			   <   >
	|	|			<   >
	|_____ |			   <   >				
	shirt				lightning

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that He is bringing His power to bear upon people’s hearts to reveal whether they are in righteousness or sin.
					
The Holy Spirit says (about all these dreams and impressions today) that it’s like learning to take dictation from Him, practicing to see if I get it all recorded accurately and interpreted accurately. This is good practice. Pictures communicate quickly. I am to learn how to make pictures on the computer and put them with my writings.

JOURNAL 4-15-05 Friday

A DREAM ABOUT JUDGING THE PROFESSING CHURCH WITH FIRE
* * * * * * * *

I was at a UMC with M and N. N was a child around 5. M was there to play piano for SS, then church, then for a wedding. I was by myself most of the time waiting for M to get finished so we could leave.  I tried to be helpful to her to get where she needed and find what she needed. This seemed to be a long time after I had worked there and some people seemed to recognize me, but not others. I didn’t recognize any of them, but it seemed like I should. The whole place seemed unfamiliar as far as where rooms were etc.

So the setting of this dream series seems to be church, the professing church, where there is a mixture of the real and the pretend. This seems to involve my service/work for God prophesying about, speaking about, what can be seen there by me. It is to help learning, worshiping, and being united to Christ. This prophesying or speaking out may come through my books some time later, after I am unfamiliar to them and they to me.

In this dream I remember seeing a bulletin which had the names along the right hand side in the margin area telling the names of the people doing that particular thing on the order of worship. I said I had thought of doing that and that I thought it was a good idea. The bulletin form was a long single paged paper.

A bulletin announces things. This may refer to names being announced showing what people are doing. The “doing” may be what the rest of this dream refers to.

During SS I was walking outside and saw smoke coming out of the building. The building seemed to have holes, and boards piled or fastened up by the holes, and previously charred places, where this smoke was coming out. I was about to go up a long stairway outside (to go inside and warn the people about the smoke) when I saw them running out of the building. Later when it seemed ok, they went back in.

So this seems to be indicating me making progress in walking in the Spirit. During learning time I am outside the situation looking on as I am seeing God manifested, His glory manifested, in the church people’s lives. Some people run away from the Holy Spirit’s fire, but might come back later.

At the wedding things were very strange. Lots of people were there sitting in what seemed like their auditorium. It had a very high tall space with places built to walk across on, and places on the upper walls had decorations built on them. These decorations seemed to be made of straw. There was a great stairway the wedding people were using to present a drama as a takeoff on some well-known (by them, not me) TV show or theater show they were imitating. For this there were people in various costumes going up the stairs and onto a stage area up at the top of the stairs.

This seems to be picturing the church worship area where some are in covenant with Christ, wedded to Him, and some are there as a pretense and out of wrong motives, they seem to be just acting a part and dressing in a costume rather than the real thing. They may be going through a process of self-promotion and ambition where they pretend they are something they really are not. They may be building with hay and stubble which will be tried with fire and burned up. 

“Now if any man build upon this foundation gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, stubble; every man’s work shall be made manifest...and the fire shall try every man’s work of what sort it is.” (1 Cor. 3:12-13) This seems to be the Scripture that this dream is about.

I could hear M playing piano music and someone else playing an organ. I sat on the floor level on a chair with lots of other wedding guests. Sometimes one or another would unwrap a wedding gift and show it. One was an amber glass bowl that was gotten for $.50 at a garage sale and announced that way.

So this seems to be picturing me prophesying into those who are in church from a position of resting (which could well be through my books). Some there have gifts of the Spirit from God. One showed a gift from God that seemed to be acceptable service/works from that person’s life/ministry/person

At one point the people seemed to be talking about who I was (their former secretary) and passing that word around, with the result of lots of people staring at me and leaning to look at me. I was a bit embarrassed and just smiled and waved with my eyes shut.

This seems to refer to people becoming aware of me and looking at me...and I have difficulty with that attention. It also may show me as having unbelief even while smiling and waving at people. My desire (eyes) may be for their good, but my unbelief may stop me from seeing what is there (good or evil). I may act like I am agreeable (smiling and waving) but am really in unbelief (eyes shut).

It’s not quite that bad, but your shut eyes may mean you don’t really see what’s going on in many people in the professed church. And you don’t like attention on yourself.

This whole dream is about the state of the church right now and where it is going in the future. Many and much will be exposed/manifested, to show the pretend, the not real, and the true, that which is on fire and manifesting Me. It is a dream about the professing church and various elements found there which I am exposing in this dream -- and am exposing in reality now and in the future. You will see some of it, and not see some of it (the exposure). It is happening. It is good. It is now.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that He is now judging the professing church as to whether what it professes is real or pretense.

JOURNAL 4-15-05 Friday

A REVELATION ABOUT THE SUBMISSION GOD DESIRES US TO HAVE
* * * * * * * *

There’s a lot of submission that needs to be learned by My people and by those who don’t belong to Me either. Submission to another’s leadership is hard to learn for many people because they aren’t taught that from childhood on as you were. Your parents might have been rigid at times and seemed hard to not get angry at, but they did teach you submission to authority - and that is one of the greatest things they did for you. You taught that to your kids too, and that is one of the greatest gifts you gave to them. Without that it is very hard for them to submit to Me...and many people find that very hard to do. They are used to having their own way and thinking that is their right to do so.

I want you to urge your readers to give themselves in willing submission to Me, and seek Me with a yielded heart. If they don’t I will need to come with My lightning bolt power (as you saw in that impression yesterday with the shirt and lightning bolt) and bring them to a place where they will submit freely to Me. I will not force My will on them and others but I will use My power to bring about what is good for them and what will cause them to desire to submit to Me. It is better and easier for them to desire yielding to Me and submission to My leadership (Lordship) in their lives. I am Lord of all -- King of kings and Lord of lords. I want to be central and first in their lives, first in importance.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that He desires submission to Him and many need to yet learn this submission. It is especially hard to learn if not taught to you as a child. You give your children a great gift by teaching them submission to authority.

JOURNAL 4-16-05 Saturday

A DREAM THAT MY BOOKS STILL NEED THE INGREDIENTS PUT TOGETHER CORRECTLY
* * * * * * * *

I was making (butterscotch?) pudding. I had on water to bring to a boil. When I wanted to add the pudding mix I couldn’t find the mix box with the recipe on it (like a Jello box). It seemed like I must have thrown it in the wastebasket. I looked in wastebaskets but the waste had already been picked up, so it wasn't there to find. I didn't know how much of the ingredients to put into the boiling water. I seemed to have the ingredients mixture and have a measuring spoon, but didn’t know how much to measure in. I looked for a spatula with a straight edge to stir it with and found that. I was thinking about just starting to add dry ingredients and keep adding until it seemed to be the right consistency. It seemed that I wasn’t sure how much water was needed also. But I never did make it in the dream, just thought about it and hunted for the box with the recipe amounts on it.

Whatever I was trying to do I didn’t know the exact amounts of things to put together to make it. I was searching for that knowledge. If this is referring to my writing, then it may show I am not sure what mix to put into it to have the correct amounts of what is needed. This may be referring to what to do with the books I am writing. The Spirit is very active in giving me things to write (boiling water), but I’m not clear yet on what to do to finish the product. The setting of this dream seems to be referring to putting together my book writing with just the correct mixture and timing – and that seems to be unclear in this dream.

A child was having a skating party for her birthday. I went in the skating area and found no children actually skating, just walking around talking. I started talking to one little girl, learned her name, and realized I had met her at another time also.

This seems to refer to children, new Christians, who will read my books. It shows them progressing in being led by the Spirit in their walk and talk. I might recognize a child as having known her before.

I was trying to untangle a gold chain (like a necklace) which was twisted around something.

It seems something of God and precious to me wasn’t quite right and needed untangling or made straight to be useful. This could be referring to wisdom/truth I have, but it needs to be used right. This seems to be a similar idea to the first dream...the ingredients are there, but not yet in the right order or amounts.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I have all the ingredients needed to put together my writings, but there still needs to be guidance about amount and timing. The people who will respond to the writings will make progress in their spiritual life. I have something precious, but it is still not all untangled and straightened out.

JOURNAL 4-17-05 Sunday

AN IMPRESSION OF A MAN WITH A CELL PHONE WANTING MY TELEPHONE NUMBER
* * * * * * * *

I looked out a window from inside a house and saw a man outside the window. He was holding up a cell phone in one hand and pointing to it with his other hand indicating he wanted me to signal my phone number (by holding up my fingers the right number of times) so he could call me.

This seems to mean the Holy Spirit is trying to get my attention so He and I can get connected and communicate.

Is my prayer being hindered, Lord?  

Yes, to some extent. It can and will get better, less hindered, as we get closer.

Am I not communicating with You, Lord?  

You are, but I want more! And closer! Do you want this too?

Yes. How do I give you my telephone number?  

You do it by giving Me what it takes to get connected with you. 

What does it take to get connected with me, Lord?  

It takes time and focus. This is what I want you to give Me more of now. You have finished the major portion of the books I have led you to write. For the rest of your days I need your time and your focus in order to finish the writing yet to be done. That’s what yesterday’s dream was about—getting the right mix or ingredients, untangling the right precious things, so you and I can finish the task of writing the 2/3’s more of “Things The Lord Has Shown Me.”  This is what you are now pregnant with—the writing yet to come in your old age, your last days on earth.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that He wants more of my time and focus so we can communicate better and more in order to finish the writings yet to be done while I am on the earth.

A DREAM OF TWO NECKLACES TO WEAR: PAST AND FUTURE
* * * * * * * *

I was given 2 necklaces to wear. One meant previous events. The other meant future events. I was told the names of the necklaces and knew that was what they meant. I don’t remember what those names were, but it seems like the first necklace regarding the past was named breakwater. This dream I awoke from during the middle of the night, maybe 3-4:00 am.

This dream seems more like a vision as it is pretty straight forward and clear: I have been given two treasures: one is the past and one is the future. I have already shared the past in the books I have been writing up until now (April, 2005). Now I have another treasure to share and that is what is in my future from now on. I am not sure what breakwater refers to, but perhaps to breaking with the past spiritual experiences, and being ready then to go into the new treasure.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that both the past and the future are precious and to be shared with others. They are gifts of God. I am now to break with the past experiences as shared in my books up until now, and go into the future books He wants me to experience and then write.

A DREAM ABOUT BEING PREGNANT AND BUYING INVESTMENTS
* * * * * * * *

I had another dream just before I awoke around 7:00 am. In this dream I know that I am pregnant and tell a woman friend. She gets tears in her eyes and walks away. I think I should tell my daughters before they hear it from other people. Since I am too old to bear a child easily, I am concerned. I started to say once that I didn’t want to have a child now (at my age) but then remembered that the child would be aware of what I said and would respond to my words negatively, so I decided to not say that anymore and try to say positive things for the child’s sake—so it would feel wanted.

This part of the dream seems to show that I tell myself that I am pregnant (with the new books the Holy Spirit wants me to write now) and this causes tears to come in my eyes (the presence of the Holy Spirit with anointing) and I begin walking in this revelation promise with the Spirit. I wanted to be positive about this new “child” being birthed and only say positive things about it, even in my old age.

A lady (whom I didn’t know) comes up to me and wants to talk. I had just met some friends of mine and they were waiting for me to join them, so I told her she could call me later. I tried to find a piece of paper to write my name and telephone number on. I looked at a newspaper to do that and was having a hard time finding a large enough piece without printing to do that. This seemed to be in an office and the man in the office wouldn’t let my friends wait there for me, so they were waiting down the hall.

It’s My messenger trying to get your attention and wanting you to have communication with her. Again it needs your telephone number referring to that which is needed to get that communication open and operating. Again the telephone number refers to time and focus. Your response in the dream is to put it off until later. The newspaper refers to announcing this as an important event with public exposure and possible prophesying.

My friends waiting for me down the hall may refer to CTC friends who must wait for me while I deal with what the Spirit is wanting me to do with her. CTC people have been asking me occasionally for more of my time to do things there. This seems to say they are to wait, and come after what the Spirit wants me to do.

The man in the office at a desk handed me a packet of papers and said we (thinking my husband and I) should use that material for buying something—seemed like investments like maybe gold or stocks—something valuable.

This may refer to the “man” in heaven (the office) who keeps accounts (in a desk) of my life. If this refers to heaven, then He wants to give me something there that is precious and with which something valuable can be purchased. Gold = Glory or wisdom: truth, precious, righteousness, glory of God), so what I can “purchase” with what He gave me is this. It is for my “husband” who is Jesus, and myself, for us to have/use. It is an investment in this valuable substance.

I wake up still trying to find a piece of paper to write my name/telephone # on and in a hurry to join my friends who are waiting for me.

It seems there is a choice here about my time use. I need to choose between doing what it takes to get the communication open and working with the Spirit, or spending time with my friends.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I am pregnant with the new work He has for me to experience and write, and it comes with walking in the Spirit under His anointing. It takes time and focus on what the Spirit is leading me to do, and takes precedence over my relations with all my friends.

JOURNAL 4-19-05 Tuesday

WORDS IN A DREAM DURING THE NIGHT
* * * * * * * *

“To be or not to be, that is the question.” 

I believe this question deals with what He has been showing me in the last few days in dreams. He wants me to set apart time and focus on Him to the exclusion of all else – putting it first. This will be needed to accomplish what He has put inside me (pregnancy) and give birth to it.

Yes, Lord, I want to “be.” I want to be all that You’ve called me to be and destined for me to do. My answer to You is YES! I choose to set aside the time and focus on You and what You want from now on in my life. I put You first, Lord. 

v
What the Lord has shown me here is asking me the question about what I choose as my priorities from now on.

A DREAM ABOUT DIFFERENT SHADES OF GREEN GRASS
* * * * * * * *

I saw a line in the grass like between two yards. One side had paler green grass. The other had darker richer green grass.

“For all flesh is as grass.” (1 Peter 1:24a)  “Ask ye of the Lord rain in the time of the latter rain; so the Lord shall make bright clouds, and give them showers of rain, to every one grass [the revelation of Christ] in the field.” (Zechariah 10:1)

v
What the Lord has shown me in this dream refers to flesh, people, and some receive more rain and revelation (darker richer green grass), and some less (pale green grass). I am to pray for the rain from God and for Him to give me revelation. 

AN IMPRESSION ABOUT A YELLOW WALL WITH WORDS ON IT
* * * * * * * *

I saw a concrete block wall painted yellow with several lines of black words at an angle on the side of it.

The wall represents what some people will be like who hear the message through my books. The yellow paint represents a gift from or of God that is applied to them. The words represent my books that are put upon them. These are applied to the wall or barrier to change the wall, the people.

This is a way you are to pray for the people who read your books.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that some people will have the words in my books, and maybe the words of my life, applied on them as a gift from God. I am to pray that the words change them and break down the barriers to receiving God.

JOURNAL 4-25-05 Monday

A DREAM ABOUT ORDERING A BIBLE WITH A BLACK COVER
* * * * * * * *

I was ordering a Bible for a boy (maybe my son) for a gift. I liked the white Bible best but thought white might not seem best for a boy – so I decided to order a Bible with a black cover for him and in NIV translation. I was going to tell this choice of what to order to my husband.

This dream seems to be about me and my attitude about what the Bible is useful for in my life. I liked best the one that was white and pure and blameless. But some part of me (the boy part) needed a Bible that would be useful (in a new translation easy to understand) for things of my past that lacked, were out of sinfulness, were out of ignorance, brought grief or mourning, or were gloomy, from wrong attitudes (like wanting as a child to be a boy to please my dad). This seemed best for giving the Word of God to those parts of me (parts from my background, childhood, and experiences, even the divorce). The dream was showing that I felt the Bible was applicable to all that too, and I wanted to give it to those “black” parts of me as a gift.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I view the Bible, the Word of God, as helpful and applicable to those dark and difficult parts of me from my past experiences, and I want to give the Bible as a gift to those. 

JOURNAL 4-26-05 Tuesday

A DREAM ABOUT ACCESSING SOLID FOOD INFORMATION IN A COMPUTER
* * * * * * * *

I was thinking of buying some food product. I could go to this computer and see the cost of it. This seemed to be something I knew about and could find, but some other people didn’t.

This dream seems to be about me. It shows me that I know how to access some teaching regarding growing toward maturity, something not everyone knows how to access. It might be referring to the book I am reading right now about Experiencing Father’s Embrace by Jack Frost which surely deals with what it takes to access the love of Father and deal with childhood hurts to make them not effective anymore in stopping spiritual and emotional maturity.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I know how to access Father’s love, which is solid food for spiritual growth. I am beginning to see the cost of accessing it.

WORDS THAT CAME DURING SOAKING TIME
* * * * * * * *

It’s not just with dreams that I make a deposit in you and seal it and carry it out, but when you pray in tongues I deposit My thought, My ideas, in you.

You will look back at this transitional year as one of the best in your life—one of peace, of quiet, and joy. I am equipping you (in a hurry) for what’s coming in your life.

Regarding the Prophetic words given you last night:
•	You are in a constant battle. The enemy wants to keep you from going out into that field (of My work for you). 
•	Words come from a spirit, the same spirit thoughts come from. (self, world, devil, God).
•	Love--I’ve put in you to take to that field—the world.
•	The best is yet ahead.

The devil imparts too. The Spirit imparts through His vessels (people) and so does the devil. That’s why you want to be cautious about who lays hands on you.

I am, and always will be, your Life, and I DO love you with an everlasting love! I am your teacher and your guide.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I am in battle and need to send forth His Word to defeat the enemy; that He has put love in me to take to others; and that my best years are ahead of me, that I’m going to enter the purpose that He put me on the planet for. 
What the Lord has shown me here is that when I pray in tongues He deposits His ideas in me; that He is equipping me in a hurry for what’s coming; that I am in constant battle; that He’s put love in me to take into the world; and that the best for me is yet ahead. He shows me that I am to be cautious about who lays hands on me because the devil imparts too. 

JOURNAL 4-30-05 Saturday

AN IMPRESSION OF A NOSE AND MOUTH
* * * * * * * *

I saw the impression of a nose first and then a mouth. The mouth seemed to be a man’s mouth since it had some beard on the chin area. 

I asked what it meant and the Spirit indicated that I would be smelling wonderful heavenly fragrances and would be speaking. The bearded chin seems to represent Christ, so it means I will be speaking His words or speaking for Him.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I will be smelling wonderful heavenly fragrances and speaking words for Christ and of Him.

A DREAM ABOUT MOSQUITOES FLYING AROUND AND PEOPLE SINGING
* * * * * * * *

In this dream I walked from room to room and saw lots and lots of mosquitoes flying around everywhere. My brother was lying on the couch on his side singing to himself. He seemed to be singing about some experience he had. He looked about 8-9 years old in size.

Another scene: Someone knocked on the front door. It was a friend or worker for a person (who might have been my husband?) sitting in the living room. We knew the person knocking was Chris. He was to come over to see the person in my room. Like a joke I was to take this big box-like thing (big enough to cover the upper half of the doorway) with me as I answered the door and put it over the door area after opening it so the box was in front of Chris. I did that. Chris just stood there and started to sing some song, and I was thrilled that he would sing then. It was such an unusual way to respond and the singing made me happy. Another man sitting inside the living room started singing along with Chris.

This first dream seems to show the mosquitoes as a nuisance, an irritant, and illusive either in my life or at my church. This may represent me like a child singing, praising, and worshiping about something that happened to me that was good. I was the focus of the dream and I was a participant in it. This “youth” is inside me and is becoming more and more revealed and manifested in me.

The second scene also involved me as a participant so it seems to be about me. The focus of the dream was on the reaction of Chris, his singing, when faced with a joke blocking his way into the room. I feel Chris stands for Christ (light), and when I block him out of me He sings to me and wins my heart and makes me happy He is responding that way. Some part of me starts to sing with Him. It seems like it was my husband who wanted me to hold the box up to the door. That makes me wonder if it represents those times and years when Christ was blocked from coming in to my “house” due to my husband’s wishes. But He didn’t let that stop Him from coming and singing to me. 

Another idea: I think the person knocking on the door is Christ. He came to see my husband. This refers to current times since it was in the living room. My husband is resting as this happens. My husband wants to block out the visitor and has me do that for him. But Christ just starts singing when the box is put in front of Him, and this delights me. Singing may represent worshiping or prophesying. The other man (unknown) sitting in the living room who also sang may represent the Holy Spirit or an angel. 

I say these dreams are to reveal something to you. The first one is to reveal that you will have minor nuisances happening around you, but you are to keep singing with/to Me. The second one is to show you that I am coming to your ex-husband now and, even though he wants to block Me out of his life, I am still singing to him and visiting him. I am the Friend or Worker in his life. He uses you to block himself from Me, but that won’t work. I will sing anyway. He cannot escape Me, and He WILL have His encounter with Me. Pray for that encounter. 

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that there will be nuisances trying to bother me, but I will keep singing about Him. He also has shown here that He is currently working with my ex-husband as a Friend and Co-worker. Even though there are difficulties to deal with and even though I block Him from coming in, He still sings through me and to me.

JOURNAL 5-1-05 Sunday

DREAMS SHOWING WORKING ON MY BOOKS FOR OTHERS
* * * * * * * *

1. In this dream the time was 10 minutes to 12:00. I was trying to work with a bunch of children to get ready to leave by 12:00. We were having a party using paper plates and cups. I was trying to get them to gather together all their stuff, but still wanted to give them more to drink before going and decided to give out clean cups for this. Seems like the cups were dark blue. I held a stack of them and began giving them out.

2. I was writing out words about myself. I was separating the words into sentences with spaces in between. They needed to be this way to fit into something that could analyze them into groups.

3. As I awoke I was saying these words: “People are like purple. They just…” (then I awoke)

After the above dreams I awoke several times with thoughts that came, and I wrote them down. I am not sure if they came in dreams or what. They seem to refer to all these above dreams and refer to the books I am writing:
•	“The words are symbols of pieces of my life.” 
•	“It’s only of value as it can be useful and understood.”
•	“The words needed to be “separated out” at the computer so they could be put in the right places.” 
•	“There were certain “inalienable rights” that my story referred to.”

1. 10 minutes to 12:00 refers to the world having only a short time left before 12:00. This can refer to the story in Matthew where Jesus talks about the bridegroom coming at midnight and about the 10 virgins (some were ready and some were not). So it probably refers to the Rapture coming soon. I was trying to work with “children” representing new Christians or immature Christians. I was trying to get them ready to leave with Jesus. I still wanted to give them more to drink. This refers to giving them the Holy Spirit, the Word, salvation. Blue cups refer to spiritual drinks. I was “giving them out” may refer to preparing and getting ready to give out my books for others to get a drink of the Spirit through them.

2. This refers to writing my books. The words are put into groups or books. They are symbols of pieces of my life. They are only of value as they can be useful and understood. They are separated out on the computer so they can be put in the right places. These books refer to things that others have a right to hear and know about the spiritual life.

3. Purple refers to royal, rule, majestic, noble. So perhaps this incomplete sentence is saying people are meant to rule and reign with Christ. But they just…..do other things, make other choices, follow Him, put off committing to Him, etc, etc. This is like a “fill in the incomplete sentence” game or test. This can be completed with all the things people do that keep them from Christ and ruling and reigning with Him.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that my books are like giving a drink of His water to children and trying to get them ready before the Rapture to rule and reign with Him.

JOURNAL 5-1-05 Sunday

DREAM ABOUT OPENING THE DOOR OF THE GOSPEL TO OTHERS
* * * * * * * *

I was in a dorm. I was to open the door between the girls’ and boys’ part and put out the fruit in some shoes.

People from CBC (Linda, Carol) were cleaning the building. One was near my room in the dorm. She was to bring me a doll about 2 feet tall (which played a song) to set up. 

Some of the cleaning made water back up in the sink and on the floor—this got on my feet. I was trying to get dressed to go to work without the dorm cleaning people seeing into my room and seeing me dressing.

A door represents an entrance, Christ, new opportunity, way, mouth. A dorm is a place where people reside/live. Girls and boys may refer to children or young Christians. Fruit refers to words, fruit of the Spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control). Shoes refers to words, Gospel. So this dream seems to be showing me something I am to do: namely, open an opportunity for people to hear the Gospel using the fruit of the Spirit and putting it into words. 

The second part of the dream refers to people I knew in the past who are cleaning their lives. A doll is a representation of a person but not a real person. Perhaps that means this person brings herself to be made into something real that sings or worships Christ.

This cleaning process sometimes caused people to get stopped up, clogged up and cause spills that got on me. I was trying to dress myself in spiritual life with Christ while not wanting people see me do this. This may mean I try to keep my secret place with Christ to myself and not lose it or expose it to others.

v
What the Lord is showing me here is that He wants me to take the Gospel to others to help transform them, bring about cleansing in their lives, and help them become real people worshiping the Lord. This process may cause some difficulty for me, but I need to keep my relationship with the Spirit separated and private.

JOURNAL 5-2-05 Monday

A REVELATION THROUGH A SONG IN MY HEAD: BILLY BOY
* * * * * * * *

After I awoke the song “Billy Boy” kept coming into my head starting with the last line: “She’s a young thing and cannot leave her mother.” That seemed like it had some message for me, so I asked Holy Spirit what. He said:

You are a young thing and cannot leave her mother. I am the mother referred to, and you are a young thing, like a baby or child spiritually, and you cannot leave Me. I don’t want you to ever leave Me. You are to remain as a young child in relation to Me and your spiritual life/journey. It’s a good thing, not a bad thing. I just wanted to remind you of this. You are growing, but you will always be “a young thing that cannot leave her mother.” That’s your message here.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is I will always be a “young thing” in relationship with Him and won’t ever leave Him or He leave me.

A REVELATION ABOUT BEING IN LEE’S SUMMIT 9 MONTHS AND GIVING BIRTH
* * * * * * * *

I found a note I had written a week or two ago saying: “9 months here—ready to give birth.” I realized as I read it today that I have been here nine months (~ from August 1, 2004 to May 1, 2005) and that I have been birthed into a new level of relationship with God. 

Today I am just “with” the Holy Spirit every moment, talking with Him, listening to Him, receiving instruction and insight from Him, even as I go about my daily activities. This has been gradually building more and more since 2000 when He told me to cultivate a more intimate relationship with Him…and it accelerated greatly the last nine months of being here in Lee’s Summit and spending my days and nights quietly with Him. I am sooo delighted with this close sharing relationship!!! Thank You, Lord!

I realize now that the song He gave me as I awoke this morning with the words “She’s a young thing and cannot leave her mother” describes this newly birthed level of relationship this month, and that I am a young thing in this new relationship, and that I cannot leave my mother (Holy Spirit). As I soak in His Presence He reminds me that “what He opens, no one can shut” (Rev. 3:7).

Later He revealed to me that “the birthing time” was last weekend (April 30-May 1, 2005) and that He was waiting until then to open up more dreams and revelations and give me more of them to write for Him. I felt the last week or two that not much was coming to me to write, and I wondered why. I now believe this is why—it was not quite yet time.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that He grew an intimate close sharing relationship inside of me for the 9 months I’ve been spending full time with Him in Lee’s Summit, and that it is now birthed. It was birthed the weekend of April 30-May 1, 2005.

REVELATIONS UPON STUDYING REVELATION 3:7-13
* * * * * * * *

These are the words of him who is holy and true, who holds the key of David. What he opens no one can shut, and what he shuts no one can open. I know your deeds. See, I have placed before you an open door that no one can shut.  (Revelation 3:7-9)

And that open door for you is this deep, intimate, every-moment relationship with Me, and all the revelations I will be taking you into because of it. It is an open door into the spiritual/heavenly realm like you have longed for. It is now birthed in you, and you are ready to write what I show you and tell you for others to read at some time in the future. This is what I want you to do; this is what My destiny plan for you is, to write these things for Me to use in other people’s lives from now on.

I know that you have little strength, yet you have kept my word and have not denied my name. I will make those who are of the synagogue of Satan, who claim to be Jews though they are not, but are liars—I will make them come and fall down at your feet and acknowledge that I have loved you.  (Revelation 3:9)

This means many who have thought they were Christians, or have acted like they were Christians, but are really not—they will acknowledge that they are not really Christians. Fall at your feet may mean they will read your books and then become aware they are not Christians. It may come at the feet of your book messages you have worked so diligently on for these 9 months and birthed them out into the world of existence from inside of you acting on My guidance.

Since you have kept my command to endure patiently, I will also keep you from the hour of trial that is going to come upon the whole world to test those who live on the earth. (Revelation 3:10)

I promise. I will keep you from the hour of trial, the tribulation, that is going to come upon the whole world to test those who live on the earth.

I am coming soon. Hold on to what you have, so that no one will take your crown. Him who overcomes I will make a pillar in the temple of my God. Never again will he leave it. I will write on him the name of my God and the name of the city of my God, the new Jerusalem, which is coming down out of heaven from my God, and I will also write on him my new name. (Revelation 3:11-12)

I have already written on you the name of My God, and the name of the city of My God, and also My new name. It is already on you. I can see it but you can’t. But the angels can see it, and I can see it, and the cloud of witnesses can see it. They/we are all rejoicing over you.

He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches. (Rev. 3:9-13)

You have an ear; you CAN hear what the Spirit says to the churches. I have given you this “ear” to hear Me, and you have committed and set apart yourself to listen and obey what you hear from Me. This is good! I am well pleased with you, My child.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that He has now opened the door into the spiritual realm between Him and me and He will now be giving me what He wants me to write for others to read at some point in time later. He has given me an ear to hear Him. He is well pleased with me.

A DREAM OF WATCHING MY DAUGHTER BUY SHOES
* * * * * * * *

I watched my daughter who bought 3 pair of shoes for $61 each. I watched her father get out $200 to pay for them. I was figuring the cost of the three pair as I saw this going on, figuring about what they would cost.

In this dream I seemed to be an observer. I wasn’t essential to the action in the dream, just observing it and thinking about what was happening.

Shoes represent words. They could mean the Gospel, covenant, or preparation. New shoes refers to new ministry or way of life. In this dream I was observing my daughter buying the Gospel, a new ministry, a new way of life. The Scripture tells us to come and buy from the Lord what He has for us that is better than gold. This dream seems to refer to that. Her father was paying for them. He could represent her heavenly Father. If this dream is about me, if she represents me, then it refers to my Heavenly Father paying the price for my new ministry and new way of life. If they refer to my daughter, herself, it means the same. 

$61: Sixty-one dollars: sixty may refer to her being tried/measured as a human person for the purpose of being accepted or rejected, a trial or a test or to be tested. One refers to beginning (first in time, rank, order or importance). This person is being tried or measured as a person in respect to a beginning of something being first in importance to her)

$200: Two represents to divide, judge, separate or discern. Hundred refers to fullness such as a full measure, full recompense, full reward, etc. So this $200 seems to represent this person is being given by her Father the full measure of dividing her out, separating her out, judging her as a payment/gift from Him. 

Since there were 3 pair of shoes, this could represent that this is done 3 times, or meaning it is set, definite, for sure. It could also refer to three meaning obedience and being conformed into the Father’s image.

What do You say about this dream, Holy Spirit?

I have a lot to say about this dream. You are just watching. You may be watching this taking place in you or in your daughter. I want you to think of this as both possibilities. I am doing this in you and have been doing it for your whole life. I am doing this in your daughter and am continuing to do this now, and will continue to do this for her whole life. I am continually working (paying) to conform you and her into the Father’s image. I pay the price; you two receive the benefit. I give the words/shoes in triple—through Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. You are both buying My words and My gift is continuing to come to both of you daily. She will be taken as far as I take her in her spiritual journey. But I want you to know I AM working with her all the time—and SHE IS buying the shoes—the words I give her. She is buying that which is precious in this life—Me. I let you see this so you would KNOW and thank Me for it.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that my daughter IS buying His words, Him, and He let me see that in this dream so I can know that and thank Him for that.

A DREAM ABOUT GOING TO “THE CLUBHOUSE” DURING THE RAIN
* * * * * * * *

I was riding in a car with some people. I told them to drop me off at “the clubhouse.” It was raining. I went up a fairly long outside stairway (maybe12 steps) to a door (like a back door to the place) to try to enter. There was no door handle on it. But the door was bent out a bit so it was slightly open at the bent place. I could get my hand into the slightly bent out place and pull the door open. I saw a narrow high stairway just inside coming up from the right and turning just inside the doorway and going up on the left side. I wasn’t sure I could climb those stairs or whether I should try. The first step was rather big. But I then saw other people going up those stairs, so I thought I could also. So I prepared to go up.

This dream is about me. I am essential to it happening and it is about what I am doing. Riding in a car refers to my ministry, person or life. I was doing this along with other people. Rain refers to Life, revival, Holy Spirit, Word of God. It was raining refers to the Holy Spirit raining down upon us (us in the car and me walking outside the car) during this dream time. 

Going up twelve steps refers to being joined in common goals, united, government, oversight. So this may refer to my being united in the common goals with others during this time of rain. It may also refer to being joined or united with those others who have gone this way before me.

The clubhouse may refer to a place of gathering for people in a commonly owned community area. This clubhouse may refer to the church where I attend and meet with others for worship, prayer and ministry. I went up the steps in this dream of common goals and being united with the church to reach this clubhouse meeting area. The church may refer to those united on the foundation that "Jesus is the Christ the Son of the living God" which Jesus build His church on in Matthew 16:18. 

“The clubhouse” may refer to the Spiritual realm that I desire to enter into. It may mean that I want to join the company of those who have entered into that Spiritual realm.

I tried to open the door into this meeting area/this Spiritual realm but it had no handle on the outside. This probably means that entrance into this area comes only from the inside, and it is not a place that can be entered from some exterior way, or by myself. It may also mean it can only be entered by being let in by someone already inside the clubhouse/the Spiritual realm. Since it seemed like I was coming in the back of the building, not the front doorway, this may refer to my attempt at entry into this place in the past in a previous event or experience. The door represents an entranceway and Christ/Holy Spirit is that way to this new opportunity in Him. 

(I could put my hand into the slightly bent out place and pull the door open.) Hands refer to works, deeds, labor, service. So it seems in this dream I entered the clubhouse/Spiritual realm by my works rather than by using a handle. This could refer to my doing discipleship work at a former church for many years, and those works helped bend the door a bit so I could use those works to open the door. Works could also refer to all the years I had quiet times and sought a Spiritual relationship with the Lord through them. These quiet times brought a possibility for opening into the Spiritual realm.

(I saw a narrow high stairway just inside coming up from the right and turning just inside the doorway and going up on the left side. I wasn’t sure I could climb those stairs or whether I should try. The first step was rather big. But I then saw other people going up those stairs, so I thought I could also. So I prepared to go up.) Coming up from the right refers to coming from the natural, and turning to the left refers to going into the spiritual. I wasn’t sure I could or should go on those stairs refers to my questioning for a long time whether I wanted to climb that way, go that way, after reading about it from such people as Bobby Connor, Paul Keith Davis, Ted Dekker, etc. The way seemed narrow and steep. The first step was rather big—meaning the decision to climb up there. But I saw others going there and realized it was possible and ok, and there was some place to get to up those stairs. So I prepared to go there too.

This seems to be a picture dream of where I am right now—wanting to climb those stairs into the supernatural spiritual realm and having made the decision to do that. This dream seems to show that process and where I am in that process. I am ready to go up there!

I want you to go there, and I have put that dream in your heart—to join Me in that trip/journey into the supernatural spiritual realm. You ARE ready and have arrived at the first major step to climb there. We will go together, you and I, and climb those stairs.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I have come through the “rain” and ministry into a place where I have chosen to enter into the supernatural spiritual realm, and am about to take my first step there.

A DREAM ABOUT SEEING MY PARENTS AND MYSELF IN THEIR BEDROOM
* * * * * * * *

I was in my old bedroom at my childhood home. Someone arrived downstairs and I was preparing to go down there. I opened the bedroom door to my parents’ room and saw 2 beds. On the right was a narrow bed with someone there. I didn’t see who, I just knew there was someone there. On the left was a wide bed with dad on the left side, someone in the middle, maybe my daughter, and mom on the right side. They were all lying down. This was surprising to me to see this.

Dreams of your house have to do with some issue in the dreamer’s life. The time of this dream may have been referring to my past since it was my old home. I was a participant in this dream. It couldn’t have transpired without me acting in it. I was observing about my past relationship with my parents evidently, if these represent my actual parents. The person between my parents may represent me as a child and represents that I was ‘between them’ in a place of rest. The people in this dream were not touching each other in this bed but were spaced about a body’s distance apart from each other. This may represent that we were not physically close or touching each other as one would if they expressed love to each other, yet we were in the same place together. The issue this dream may represent is the lack of physical showing of affection between my parents and me, and them for each other (as a child was between them). A bedroom refers to intimacy and this may refer to a distance between each of my parents and myself.

If the parents represent symbolically my Heavenly Father, God, and my heavenly mother, the mother heart of God, or perhaps my source or the Holy Spirit, then this dream could be showing me that there is still some distance between us, but that we are in a place of intimacy and resting together. Which is it, Lord?  

It is representing both. You may see this dream as depicting your relationship with your parents who were together with you as a child sort of protecting you by keeping you in between them, even though they and you were not touching each other physically showing physical affection and love. They still loved you and protected you and kept you resting between them.

And you can see that our relationship is similar. My Father and I have you sandwiched in between us, representing being with us in a resting intimate place together where we can talk and share and enjoy each other’s company. We are not physically touching, but spiritually close and intimate. You are forever protected by us on both sides. I was showing you this in that dream too.

v
What the Lord has shown me in this dream is that my biological parents loved me and protected me and kept me resting between them, even though we did not physically show affection by much hugging and touching. He has also shown me that He is forever protecting me on both sides and that we are spiritually close and intimate.

A REVELATION ABOUT HOW OUR SPIRITUAL LIVES ARE LIKE EATING FOOD
* * * * * * **

As I got breakfast this morning the Holy Spirit was starting to teach me something about how our Spiritual lives are similar to the preparation of food and eating it. The idea came to write down the steps it takes to eat a meal. I wrote these steps:

Look at all the preparation and planning and work it takes BEFORE you actually eat the meal. Your books are like that—eating a meal. You are doing lots of planning, making lists, buying food, storing food, preparing food, cooking food, and then giving it to others to eat (reading your books). You can’t even make them eat it after you have done all that work ahead. So I want you to know that I appreciate all that work you are doing so others may “eat” the food you have put in your books for them. However I must be the One who gets them to eat that food and see that it serves the purpose for which they are to eat it. And I am the one to help others eliminate what they don’t need and keep what they do need. Your part of this endeavor is to do everything ahead of the actual eating, and I must do the rest. Your books will be like eating good food to other people when they read them and are open to My revealing things to them as they do. Pray for that.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that my part of our endeavor together is to plan, prepare and write the books He wants to use to feed others. His part will be to get the books printed, distributed, and read by those He wants to read them, and to reveal things to them as they read.

JOURNAL 5-4-05 Wednesday

DREAM OF SEEING GAS STATIONS AND A PORTAL TO GET THERE
* * * * * * *

In this dream what I saw was 2 buildings, very plain box shaped buildings, sitting on a concrete area. I thought they were gas stations. It was like I could sense or “see” a pathway/portal/shaft which led there as I watched this scene from above. And I just knew this pathway had something to do with pink spots/dots, but I didn’t see any reason for that. It was just something I knew.

When I awoke it was so difficult to try to put this into words and I went back to sleep and dreamed it again. Or at least it seemed like that was what happened. So the second time when I awoke I tried to put into words what I sensed happened in this dream. It was very difficult because it wasn’t clear or precise but hazy or nonspecific.

There were no people acting in this dream. I was the only person involved and I wasn’t doing anything, but I was seeing this. So as I tried to write this information out, this is what I wrote besides what is written here so far:

These gas stations seemed to be the focus of my attention. I seemed to be expecting to return to them and was leaving a way to do that in my plans. I would picture in my mind the way to return, almost like it was a pathway or portal or shaft of air or space. I wanted to leave a place for that so I could keep returning there. It was like it was more of a thought than a dream, so there is not much to write down about it.

Seems like I had this thought/dream twice and awoke in between but didn’t know what to write to describe the idea. After the second time I decided to try. It seemed very illusive. After writing this much, I asked: Is this from You, Lord?

I did show you something or have you experience something.

What was it?

It was a portal into heaven. It looked like a gas station you were trying to reach as a destination to signify this as the place/way you go to “fill up” with the substance (gas) that keeps you going—gives you fuel and power. The two buildings represent a double amount of gas or a double portion. The cement was seen so the area would look like or resemble a gas station.

Why did you show me this?

The main idea is—if you want to travel or go to the place of being filled or fueled with power, you must prepare and allow space and time to do so, and follow the portal/shaft that takes you there (to the heavenly filling station). I am the way.

You, Holy Spirit?

Yes. I am the way. Jesus and I are one. And I take you there.  Your job is to be aware of and open to it. And desire it.  I made it symbolic on purpose rather than clear—to see if you would “search out” the meaning—like searching out the meaning of an impression which is fleeting.

The feeling/dream/impression is gone now as I write this, but I “sense” that something is now deposited inside me—like I sensed something deposited in me the day Pastor Alan prayed for me during morning worship service for more gifting in intercession.

The two filling stations looked absolutely plain and ordinary—disguised to me unless I searched out the meaning. They didn’t look heavenly or like anything enticing. I think that seeing this dream two times also means it’s set, established, and will happen.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is--How do you make plans for return to the place of special closeness to the Lord for refilling? By leaving space and time in your life and schedule to do so. You go there through your relationship with Jesus. He is the way.

SOAKING AND MEDITATION TIME
* * * * * * * *

In my quiet soaking time this morning (after having this dream) the Holy Spirit led me to picture Him and me sitting on a bench looking out over a park area and watching a fountain in front of us as well as people walking, playing, etc. Gradually I saw us near the beach at the Gulf of Mexico (like I saw when I visited there). I was looking out over the beautiful calm blue-green waters and seeing the beach area between us and the water. The fountain was still there but gradually moved off to my right and I saw a dipping well in front of us (like I saw in the vision at camp one summer). I wanted to get the fountain and well out of that vision and look out at the ocean water without those in the way. But the Holy Spirit said basically that the ocean represented heaven and when I get to heaven I get to have the unending water of heaven without any obstructions in the way. But now, while on earth, I must get my water from the well a little at a time, and wash in the water of the fountain. So they needed to be in the “picture” right now. He and I just sat there and soaked in the peace and quiet and beauty together. It was so wonderful!

I also “saw” by imagination, and by faith, in the spirit, a room up in heaven where I saw a large book which was the record of my life. I was shown that everything for which I had asked and received forgiveness was blotted out of that book. I wanted to be able to blot out everything sinful from my life, especially from childhood, everything that I did which was considered sin by the Lord, but I knew I didn’t know or remember what those things were. I have especially gone through a time of asking forgiveness for every grudge and vow and judgment I made against other people – every one I can recall. But I believe there are some I can’t recall, especially from early childhood. So I asked the Lord to forgive me for those unknown sins and blot them out also.

A DREAM ABOUT COOKING STEAKS AND GROWING PLANTS
* * * * * * * *

In this dream I was working with church leaders. We were preparing steaks by cooking them for others to eat. We would get out the steaks one at a time from where they were stored chilled, and pass them to the next person who would cook them. Then we would sell them or wrap them to keep for use later.

In this dream some other people and I were preparing potted house plants to sell.

In both these dream I was participating along with other people. I think these two dreams are about me and what I will be doing together with other people. In the first dream the other people were specifically church leaders. 

Steak is meat, solid food we prepared for others to buy. Cooking the food seems to refer to putting that food through personal experiences before giving it out to others to buy. Others buy that food from our experiences and eat it to give them spiritual sustenance. I think this dream sequence refers to the ARC, the new training school starting at CTC in September. In this school leaders will be giving out solid food which has come through their own personal experiences for others to “buy.” Others can get that food from these people at the ARC. 

Potted house plants may refer to giving out something which has life in it, is living and growing and green. I remember seeing one plant that needed some more water because it’s soil was dry and cracked, so I gave it some more water (the Word).

v
What the Lord has shown me here is a picture of leaders preparing spiritual food and giving it out to those who come to receive it. It also pictures leaders preparing things that are living and growing and need the water of the Word.

SCRIPTURES BROUGHT TO MY REMEMBRANCE THIS MORNING
* * * * * * *

I will stand at my watch and station myself on the ramparts; I will look to see what he will say to me…..Then the Lord replied: “Write down the revelation and make it plain on tablets so that a herald may run with it. For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay.”   (Habakkuk 2:1-3)

This Scripture refers to the books I am writing. The Lord made this Scripture very special to me many many years ago and I realize now, today, it refers to the books He is having me write.

The other Scripture that comes to my attention today refers to buying from the Lord that which is free. It seems to fit with today’s dream about buying steaks and potted plants – and also seems to fit many things in recent dreams about getting water.

Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost. Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy? Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and your soul will delight in the richest of fare. Give ear and come to me; hear me, that your soul may live….. Seek the Lord while he may be found; call on him while he is near.  (Isaiah 55:1-3, 6)

And then the Lord impressed me with another verse: Isaiah 55:12

You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and the hills will burst into song before you, and all the trees of the field will clap their hands.

What is in my mind today from the Lord is that this refers to the Rapture—to come soon.

JOURNAL 5-6-05 Friday

DREAMS ABOUT VARIOUS SUBJECTS
* * * * * * * *

I had many snippets of dreams during the night and wrote them when I awoke several times:

This dream involved a reunion with a doctor who broke with them at sea.

My thoughts on this dream are that it refers to someone coming to Christ out of the sea of humanity into which he had gone. It also could refer to my ex-husband (a doctor) who comes into reconciliation with his family after having broken with us previously through separation and divorce.

These words came in a dream: “I need your help!” Help was voiced loudly and emphatically.

My thoughts on this dream are they could refer to that doctor needing help getting reconciled.

I (and unknown others) drove to PA where I was to pick up a new baby. We visited a man’s house and he wanted to give me money for a gift for the baby. But he didn’t give it to me then because he said he didn’t have his checkbook there. Later I was back from PA and at the medical center gift shop. I wanted to pick up that gift the man said he wanted to give but I didn’t know how much to spend on it. Then the gift shop lady brought a gift that seemed to be from that man, so she brought it to me since she knew I was looking for one.

My thoughts on this dream are that this man may represent Christ.  He wanted to give me money for this new baby, which I think represents my book writing (since that is the new thing God is doing in me right now). He didn’t give the money to me then, but did send it later through a gift. The money could be actual money, or provision for my living during the writing time, or it could refer to power, or spiritual riches (i.e. faith, wisdom, spiritual gifts, etc.) If this represents Christ then going to his house may refer to going into His Presence during my Quiet Times and worship. My provision for living and/or for publishing the books didn’t come when I started these books, but this dream may show me it is still coming, but later, as a gift. The gift shop lady could refer to an angel.

The drive by car to PA was at night. The road was divided with fence on both sides of two lanes. I took the right lane but then realized I should have taken the left one because I was on a birm area. I couldn’t turn around or change lanes due to the fences on both sides of me. These fences were very close to my car and it was a narrow lane. So I slowly backed up and got out of that lane back to where these two lanes began.

My thoughts on this dream are this refers to my life and ministry. I am traveling during the night, which means right now during the darkness in the world before Christ returns. I took the natural way at first thinking it was the way to go, then I realized it wasn’t. I backed up or went back to a different place so I could change to the better way, the spiritual way in God’s strength. There were fences or obstacles which made this difficult to change, but it was able to be accomplished carefully and slowly by backing up. This makes me think this may refer to my going into the fleshly lane of marrying and going my husband’s direction for many years. This put me into a fenced situation which was difficult to get out of. But eventually it was done and I was free to choose again the spiritual way. Is that what this dream is about, Lord?

Yes, you are thinking correctly.

My brother was there in the room with us and he was hurt (had tears in his eyes) because it was his birthday and no one noticed. He made a sign and put it up pointing to himself saying it was his birthday. I was involved, not as a participant, but observing this.

If my brother refers to me, then perhaps I am being given a sign or directions for observing my Spiritual birth or new life in Christ. My thoughts are this is telling me to notice, follow the directions for, and watch the signs of my new life in Christ. Perhaps I am not paying attention enough to it. What do You want me to pay attention to, Lord?

You are changing a lot. You have come much closer to Me in your quiet times/soaking times and we have developed a “new life” together. We have developed the ability to talk to each other all through the day, and you seldom go away” into the world” for a great length of time. You allow Me to be with you now as you walk through this world – even allow Me to watch TV with you and listen to the news with you, etc. This is a “new life” or “new birth” for you into a closer relationship with Me. I want you to notice it!

A large group was going into an auditorium to hear a concert of all brass players from many different bands gathered together for this concert. I was seated on the front row at the right end (as you looked toward the front of the auditorium) beside M. The chairs seemed to be able to overlap each other so we could push them together for a small sitting area or draw them apart for a larger area. Right in front of us there seemed to be a large something lying on its side clear across the stage area. It was lying down like a cat does, but I didn’t notice or remember what it was. It seemed almost like it was a stuffed animal or person lying there. Behind this the brass players were gathering on risers getting ready to perform. Some lady said we didn’t know the songs (which had the words listed on the program) which we were supposed to sing along with the brass players. I said they were like military songs, thinking we would recognize the songs when they played them.

My thoughts on this dream are that it refers to The Church universal or perhaps CTC, my church. People were gathering in the Church from all over and finding rest or positions there. There were many prophets preparing to prophesy. I was a participant there and was with a friend waiting. 

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What the Lord has shown me here is: 1. There may be reconciliation coming in our family which needs help, 2. A gift may be coming to help me with my new ministry of writing, 3. I am to take notice of my new life in Christ now, 4. Prophecy will be coming in a large amount to many people of different faith groups.

JOURNAL 5-7-05 Saturday

A DREAM ABOUT MAKING DIRECTIONAL CHANGES IN MY LIFE AND CHURCH
* * * * * * * *

1. I was at my childhood home preparing things to begin a teaching year. My Mom was also going to teach that year and she needed to turn in some forms that needed to be filled out, so she left to take those forms wherever they needed to be turned in. I seemed to be alone at home as I don’t remember seeing anyone else at my home.

2. I was in the front yard of my childhood home. I was trying to take the brown dead branches out of a palm tree (like Palm Sunday palm branches) and leave the green ones there. I pulled a green one out by mistake. Then I tried to reinsert that live branch back into the tree, but it didn’t work. It seemed that almost all the palm tree was dead and there wasn’t much left when I pruned it by taking out the dead parts. This seemed to be part of a display of those palm branches in a white Styrofoam-like substance.

•	Home may refer to my heart. Childhood home may refer to the time of my childhood in my heart.
•	Front yard refers to future or now. Could refer to that which is to come
•	Mother refers to source: Church, spiritual or natural mother, love, kindness
•	Begin a teaching year may refer to being at the beginning of teaching others (perhaps through books or some other ministry at CTC or elsewhere)
•	Tree refers to a person or covering, a leader, shelter. This tree refers to church since Palm Sunday is a celebration held at church. It seems this display refers to a previous church I attended and we did a lot of displaying palm branches. This seems to refer to its display of churchiness and being alive, but is shown here to have many dead branches in it and to be held into place by being stuck in stiff Styrofoam to hold it together. This may refer to all churches who seem to be live palm trees but really have many that are dead in them. Scripture says “the righteous shall flourish like a palm tree.” (Psalm 92:12)
•	The live branch that I pulled out and couldn’t reinsert—that could be referring to me. I pulled myself out of that church and just couldn’t get back into being part of it anymore.

3. In another dream scene I was still in the same front yard of my parents’ home, but this time the yard and I seemed to be high up in the air. I looked way down over the front of the yard to an area a long distance down to see the road that ran in front of that front yard. Down below, on that road I saw a car or vehicle, which was so far away it looked like a small block of rectangle shape. It seemed to be black or a very dark green. It turned onto our road, drove past our front yard and turned into our driveway. Then it started to back up as if it had turned into the wrong driveway and wanted to go somewhere else. When it backed up it moved sideways south toward the property next door past the lilac bushes. This property seemed to belong to someone else as I had seen some people working on it earlier, perhaps preparing the soil or something. This car then backed up onto the road clear back to around the mailbox area and started south down the road again. Suddenly a curve appeared in the road which seemed to have a battery sitting right at the curve, and the car ran into that battery. The battery seemed to be red. Something pushed up out of the battery when it was hit, something white, then went back down again. The car backed up and went the same way again and hit the battery again, and the same thing happened again. I watched all this from high up above.

The setting of the dream was my childhood home, primarily outside in the front yard. I was the main person involved, although there seemed to be some people next door whom I saw working outside in their yard, and there seemed to be someone driving the car mentioned. I saw no familiar face. So I am the focus of this dream, although in the third part I was mainly observing. I think the sphere of the dream is intrinsic, i.e. about me, my emotions, my heart desires, etc. Since the setting is at my childhood home perhaps it is about things from my past. Since it takes place primarily in the front yard that may mean I am seeing these things in the present or future.

In this dream it seems that I am looking at myself from a distant view, perhaps heavenly or a spiritual view. I see myself going along life’s way, the Christian faith way, doing what I have been created to do, my purpose in life. Then I see myself making some changes in direction—i.e. backing up, turning into driveway, going south on road again, driving right into a red battery which refers to power and passion in prayer and motivation. Out of that comes something pure and righteous and with truth. Since hitting the battery happened twice, perhaps that means it is set, fixed, sure to happen. This seems to be happening now and in the future.

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What the Lord has shown me in this dream series is that in my past I pulled myself out of a past church experience and in the present and future I will be traveling a way including power and passion and zeal in my ministry walk.

JOURNAL 5-9-05 Monday

A DREAM ABOUT A DISH THING IN FRONT OF ME
* * * * * * * *

I awoke about 3:00 a.m. with these words in my mind that I felt I needed to write down: “And a dish thing in front of me.” In the dream just before I awoke I was observing myself walking or standing. It seemed like there were words traveling in front of me. I noticed that some of the words formed in a special way that set them apart, almost like they were surrounded by a parenthesis and perhaps in a different font. They were separate from the other words in this way and caught my attention. It seemed that if I “saw” this “something” group I could do it. It seemed almost like it was a vision or dream set before me but it was made up of words, not pictures. No one else was in this dream but me. It seemed to be showing me something about myself.

“Dish thing” could represent a satellite dish symbolizing broadcasting what I “see” (in words) to many others. This may be a vision or dream the Lord wants me to hold in front of my eyes during my spiritual walk/journey. This could refer to where my books (made up of words) are “going out” to many others—perhaps a dream (in my field of dreams I read about yesterday by Todd Bentley) I am to pray for and declare for. Being in front of me may refer to now and the future.

It’s like Dr. Cho holding a picture of a bicycle (that he had asked the Lord for) in front of his eyes and praying for it and envisioning it (in the 4th dimension). Or it’s like Todd Bentley “seeing” in his divine imagination himself speaking to 5,000 people with healings, etc. This was the way he “pulled it down” from Heaven (where it already was) to earth.

When I finished writing this much the clock said 3:33 and it drew my attention like it was meaningful. This could confirm to me the dream was from the Trinity and was set, established, and going to take place. It also could refer to coming into conformity to Him and being obedient to Him.

It’s like I am to envision my writing/books “out there” on a satellite ready to be “tuned in to” by all whom the Lord gives a “dish” to tune in to them and their message. It’s like I am to see the words ahead of me in my pathway and see them as special words going out to others through my books, and I am to envision that, and declare that, and pray for that.

This is not being arrogant or prideful. It is co-operating with the Lord in bringing this dream into being “on earth as it is in Heaven.” He gives the dream. I work with Him to bring it to earth.

It’s like in Bruce Wilkinson’s book The Dream Giver. God has shown this technique/idea to these 3 men who explained the same or a similar idea in their own ways. I want to read again all three (Dr. Cho, Todd Bentley, Bruce Wilkinson) and compare similarities and ideas.

Seeing the dream before me (in my imagination) is my way of contending rather than striving. It reminds me of something I saw on TV recently that stuck in my mind. The idea was: “If you see it, you can build it.”

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What the Lord has shown me here is that I am traveling a pathway in life and words are in front of me along that way. Some are extra special words like a vision, and I am to see them as being sent out and received by others almost like by satellite dish. I believe this refers to the books still in front of me to be written, published, and distributed to others.

They are to be free, and they WILL go forth to others around the world, wherever I take them, and broadcast to others the message I want to take to them. I will publish these books at the proper time, maybe even after you leave in the Rapture, and I will see to the distribution, and I will tune people in to them so they can receive My words through them. I will do it all. You just pray it down to earth, one word at a time, and write those words down in books for Me to use – “In His Time” as you heard in that song this morning. Every word that I have you write I will use.

JOURNAL 5-10-05 Tuesday

DREAMS OF JAPANESE HAIRDOS AND MY CHILD GROWING QUICKLY
* * * * * * *

3:12 a.m. I was making Japanese hairdos for women and for myself. This meant I was putting their hair into place so it was drawn up and curled at the back of the head to stay up.

5:51 a.m. I was watching my child as she grew up very quickly and soon learned to move around. I watched her experiment getting out of her play pen and even getting outside by herself and running down the street. I was teaching her to respond to my calls. It seemed like she grew to about 2-3 years of age in only a few days after her birth. Time at end: 5:55.

In the first dream I was participating in it and active in it with people whom I didn’t know. I was affecting them by arranging their hair. Hair refers to covering: (+) covenant, or (-) humanity, the old sinful nature, doctrine, or tradition. So my rearranging the hair of these unknown people may refer to affecting people’s covering or covenant, their doctrines or traditions. I think this may mean my books, when read by others with the Holy Spirit teaching them, will be changed.

In the second dream I was participating along with my new baby and some person who was taking instruction for caring for the baby. She and I watched this baby grow quickly, try new things, get out of her playpen and start running down the street in freedom and independence. I was teaching this new child to respond to what I told her to do, for her own safety. This seems to be a dream about how quickly this new work of downloading treasures or revelation to put in my books is growing and progressing, yet is responsive to my direction too. 5:55 speaks to me of triple grace!

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What the Lord has shown me here is that the books will be used in changing others’ lives and the revelations He brings me will come and grow quickly.

NOTES ON LISTENING TO A CASSETTE TEACHING BY TODD BENTLEY
* * * * * * *

THE FATHERS HOUSE

Todd taught about nine rooms—places we go to in prayer. He gave Scripture in regard to these rooms:

Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.  (John 14:1-3)

How priceless is your unfailing love! Both high and low among men find refuge in the shadow of your wings. They feast on the abundance of your house; you give them drink from your river of delights. (Psalm 36:7-8)

Blessed are those you choose and bring near to live in your courts! We are filled with the good things of your house, of your holy temple. (Psalm 65:4)

My addition to Todd’s scriptures: One thing I ask of the Lord, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple. (Psalm 27:4)

1.	Living room: prayer is about us, our needs, blessings, petitions, requests
2.	Kitchen: room of ministry, serving, working, doing, like Martha
3.	Dining: banqueting table, honey, manna cakes, meat, joint heir with Jesus so sit with him here, room of experience and tasting Him
4.	Storage room: Spirit of counsel, wisdom, room of light, treasure chest, revelation, able to get in the download of revelation with no effort
5.	Study: library, room to meditate in His Word day and night
6.	Recreation room: fun, celebration, dancing, worship, banners, flags, joy
7.	Bathroom: get cleaned up, repentance, forgiveness
8.	Basement: hidden room of intercession, labor for someone else
9.	Bedroom: white, flowers, with Jesus in intimacy, Song of Solomon, romance

Other rooms he saw at later times: yard, forest, river, ballroom (dancing with Lord). Another speaker mentioned he saw an award room. Last door in long hall of rooms: throne room from behind the throne

There’s a writing room. I’ve taken you there many times.

Ask: “Holy Spirit, bring me into a place in Your presence I’ve never been before.”

* * * * * * * *

As I meditated on visiting the rooms Todd mentioned, and going through a hallway to get there, the Holy Spirit began to teach me that I’ve been to a number of these “rooms” or places in the Spiritual realm already and I didn’t go through a hallway and open the doors to get there as Todd did. The Lord has worked with me a little differently but yet taken me to a number of places in my experience. He reminded me of these:

Music room: this is where I am when I sing in the spirit at home to the Lord. I am in this room when I am worshiping at church too. This is where I go when listening to great music which takes me to this realm.

Beach room: this is where He has taken me several times when He has me picture myself and Him sitting on a bench in the shade of trees but looking out toward the sandy beach and the Gulf of Mexico. We sit on the bench and talk together and He tells me things. He also took me here when I walked out of the water up to the shore and He was there and gave me a gift.

Protection room: this is where He took me when He gave me the picture of myself inside a bubble of protection and told me to stay in there.

Vision of the future room: He has taken me there many times when He showed me something that was coming…i.e. when He showed me the series of vision pictures in 1985 which included the picture of the Rapture. He took me there recently when He gave me a revelation about the next season of my life and what I would be doing. Also He showed me there would be revival in Hawaii, and that we are now in the valley of decision.

Guidance and instruction room: He took me there when He showed us walking along a pathway with Him walking backward facing me, and us holding hands. He showed me He would keep me on the right pathway and not let me get off the side of it if I would keep my hands in His. He also took me here when He showed me the fan tail picture with instructions printed on it. My instruction was “follow Me.” This is also where He took me when I saw myself in a maze and He was guiding me. He also took me there when He showed me a picture of Himself as a Shepherd and me as a sheep walking along beside Him through a valley.

Sunshine room: room of light and illumination on something that was previously dark and not understood. He took me there when He came to me on the front porch of my home in the dark, and suddenly it was light, and He then led me into a grassy area where we danced. He led me there also on the day at camp when it became suddenly clear to me that our marriage was finished and I could rightly take off my wedding ring that I had been holding on to.

Angel room: the place where we see angels. He took me there in the vision at camp where I saw three angels with trumpets.

Warfare room: this is the place He teaches me how to fight the war with the enemy. He took me there the time He showed me an ant (which represented the enemy) on the kitchen floor and indicated I could step on it…that Satan was that small compared to His great power which I have to overcome Satan and fight him.

Provision room: this is the place He takes me when I need food to strengthen me, or financial provision, etc. He took me there when He gave me the picture of birds eating seeds one seed at a time, and He told me He would provide for me the same way. He also took me there when He showed me He would be bring me twice as much as before the divorce.

Well room: this is the room where He shows me Himself as the well of salvation. He took me there at camp when I saw a well in front of me and dipped water from it into myself.

Nursery room: this is the place where we nurse new life and help it grow. This is where He takes me when I dream about being pregnant with something new. He brought me there last night as I watched my new baby grow into a young child in just a few days.

Travel room: this is the room where He shows us places He wants us to go or will be going. This could involve actual bodily travel or traveling through writing my books. He took me there when He gave me a prophecy through W. that I would go to other countries.

Garden room: He takes me there many times when I sing the song “In The Garden” and picture us walking in a flower garden together.

Teaching room: this is where He teaches me things I didn’t know. He takes me there sometimes when I am studying Scripture and learning things. He also takes me there when He gives me information about something or someone like last Sunday during church service when He put in my mind that E needed B for something.

Discipling room: this is where He disciples us and gives us ideas about how to disciple others. He took me there many times as I sought Him about what to do in the discipleship program at a previous church.

Counseling room: in this room He gives us guidance about counseling others and understanding ourselves. He has taken me there when He showed me people I needed to forgive and things in my past experience that need to be dealt with.

Writing room: here is where He takes me often as I seek Him for what He wants written in our books we are writing together. I spend many hours in this room—in fact, that is where I am writing from right now. He guided me to put these ideas in writing for others to see later. He took me there when He showed me the vision about the white desk with spiral bound books in a drawer.

Throne room: He has taken me there many times as I “see” Him in my God given imagination at His Father’s right hand and they are high up and I worship them. Also at times He has guided me to see myself at His (Jesus) right hand seated with him in the heavenlies and having His authority.

Blessing room: I was there the time He showed me a picture of myself kneeling and the pastor blessing me.

Treasure room: He took me there at the Glory School when He showed me a picture of treasure being poured down from above into my head. He also took me there when I saw the bluebird fly over my head with a gift, a revelation, that He was planting into me for it to grow like a seed.

Warning room: He took me here when He gave me the impression about a cat coming out from under an end table showing me that something was going to be revealed that previously was hidden regarding my personal life and relationships.

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What the Lord has shown me here is that He has many places/rooms for us to come and be with Him and learn from Him…and that He has already taken me to many of them.

JOURNAL 5-11-05 Wednesday

A DREAM OF SEEING A PERSON AND A REPLICA OF HIM/HER
* * * * * * * *

In a dream around 1:45 a.m. I could see there was a person and something beside him like a replica of him. I saw this before my eyes 3-in-a-row like:

	I   	W    			I  	W   			I  	W
 Person    replica		       Person   replica		     Person      replica

The replica was shaped like a “word” bubble in comic strips. (This symbol is close but not the same as in the dream) So the replica seems to refer to the same person but having the Word in them. Three times refers to this being set, certain to happen.
	        
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What the Lord has shown me here is that I see myself now and in the future as a person living with the Word inside me and this is set and certain to come.

REVELATION ABOUT NOT LIVING BY BREAD BUT BY THE WORD
* * * * * * * *

Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God. (Matthew 4:4)

Jesus—in the wilderness experience—in His time of temptation, said this to Satan. The idea conveyed to me was that I wasn’t to live by just eating natural bread, but that I needed to LIVE by the word that God gives me. 

A fear of pain, that’s what you have, a fear of pain. 

This was in reference to the mastectomy, chemo, and following physically painful events I had, including doctor visits and clinic checkups…Also in reference to my parents enduring so much heart trouble pain. That’s a reason I don’t want to go to the doctor anymore because they might find something wrong that could inflict more pain.

I wanted you to recognize it for what it is. Do you want to be free of that fear?

Very much! How do I get free of fear, Lord?

Love. You can’t do it. Only I—supernaturally. Remember in the Narnia book how the children were free of fear when they rode on the back of Aslan? That’s because they were that close to Me and totally dependent on Me, and knew I could handle anything that might come. I want you to get on My back and ride with Me, everywhere, all the time. You will never be alone, and I can totally handle everything that comes—even fear (which is an attack of the enemy). I have to do this supernaturally. Do you want Me to?

Yes! Is that possible, Lord?

With God, all things are possible. Do you believe this?

Yes, I do. You said so, so it is the truth.

Then I will do it. It is My grace gift to you today. I will “come upon you” and free you from that fear. Expect that.

I promise you this! I took your fear upon Me on the cross. Look up Scriptures on fear, type them out, print them and say My Word on it. We’ll do this together.

Fear is what Satan has used to control and manipulate you most of your life. Some reasons it came:
1.	falling off table at 3 months old
2.	almost drowning as a child
3.	disciplined with fear
4.	taught to be afraid of your dad

You will now live on My Word!

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What the Lord has shown me here is that I currently live in fear and Satan uses that to manipulate me. The Lord is promising to deliver me from that fear and I am to now live on His Word.

SCRIPTURES ABOUT FEAR AND GOD’S PROTECTION
* * * * * * * *

Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still. (Exodus 14:11-14)

Do not be afraid. God has come to test you, so that the fear of God will be with you to keep you from sinning. (Exodus 20:20)

Do not be afraid of them; the Lord your God himself will fight for you. (Deuteronomy 3:22)

O Sovereign Lord, you have begun to show to your servant your greatness and your strong hand. For what god is there in heaven or on earth who can do the deeds and mighty works you do? (Deuteronomy 3:24)

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go. (Joshua 1:9)

This is what the Lord says to you: “Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s…You will not have to fight this battle. Take up your positions; stand firm and see the deliverance the Lord will give you…do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Go out to face them tomorrow, and the Lord will be with you.” (2 Chronicles 20:15, 17)

To the Lord I cry aloud, and he answers me from his holy hill. I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the Lord sustains me. (Psalm 3:4-5)

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. . (Psalm 23:4-5)

The Lord is my light and my salvation—whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life—of whom shall I be afraid? … Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then will I be confident. (Psalm 27:1, 3)

God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. (Psalm 46:1)

He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday. (Psalm 91:4-6)

But whoever listens to me will live in safety and be at ease, without fear of harm. (Proverbs 1:33)

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight (or he will direct your paths). (Proverbs 3:5-6)

When you lie down, you will not be afraid; when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet. (Proverbs 3:24)

Have no fear of sudden disaster or of the ruin that overtakes the wicked, for the Lord will be your confidence and will keep your foot from being snared. (Proverbs 3:25-26)

Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe. (Proverbs 29:25)

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. (Isaiah 41:10)

For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. (Isaiah 41:13)

But now, this is what the Lord says—he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. (Isaiah 43:1-2)

I, even I, am he who comforts you. Who are you that you fear mortal men, the sons of men, who are but grass.  (Isaiah 51:12)

Do not be afraid; you will not suffer shame. Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated. (Isaiah 54:4)

In righteousness you will be established; tyranny will be far from you; you will have nothing to fear. Terror will be far removed; it will not come near you. (Isaiah 54:14)

Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. (Matthew 10:28)

I have given you authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all the power of the enemy; nothing will harm you. (Luke 10:19)

Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom. (Luke 12:32)

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. (John 14:27)

For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.” (Romans 8:15)

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:37-39)

Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage; be strong. (1 Corinthians 16:13)

But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen and protect you from the evil one. (2 Thessalonians 3:3)

For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. (2 Timothy 1:7)

Therefore he is able to save completely those who come to God through him, because he always lives to intercede for them. (Hebrews 7:25)

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. (Hebrews 12:1-2)

God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” So we say with confidence, “The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?” (Hebrews 13:5-6)

For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil. Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. Do not fear what they fear; do not be frightened. (1 Peter 3:12-14)

NOTES ON CASSETTE TEACHING BY TODD BENTLEY ON SOAKING
* * * * * * * *

While he is soaking (resting quietly in the Lord's presence) he experiences what he calls “the glory liquid honey cloud of His Presence” coming like heaviness, like waves. Being quiet before the Lord is the highest form of prayer – silence. Soaking is receiving.

But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil.  (Hebrews 5:14)

Be still, and know that I am God. (Psalm 46:10)

Samuel was lying down in the temple of the Lord, where the ark of God was. Then the Lord called Samuel…So Samuel went and lay down in his place. The Lord came and stood there, calling as at the other times, “Samuel! Samuel!” then Samuel said, “Speak, for your servant is listening.” And the Lord said to Samuel… (1 Samuel 3) 

In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength. (Isaiah 30:15)

IDEAS ABOUT WHAT I CAN DO WITH FEAR
* * * * * * *

•	You can rebuke fear
•	You can recognize it as sin, and if you embrace it, then repent
•	You can counter it with My word

JOURNAL 5-12-05 Thursday

DREAM ABOUT STARTING A NEW SINGLES SUNDAY SCHOOL CLASS
* * * * * * *

I was starting up a new singles SS class which was meeting temporarily in a choir rehearsal room. I was in this room writing something on the board, and people were gradually arriving. One person suggested the class be called “flaming singles.” We would each need to buy our own materials. We were sitting on chairs in a circle as they came in. There were around 10-12 there eventually. I didn’t recognize any faces. I would lead this class.

The focus of the dream seems to be about this new class starting of Christians. This dream is about me. In this dream I am participating as the leader of this new class, and I am first on the scene getting things ready for the class to begin. The first 2 people who came seemed to be men faceless and unknown, so they may represent angels or people I don’t know. One of them said the only words in the dream: flaming singles. Flaming likely refers to being on fire for God. Singles probably refers to individual people. Temporarily meeting in the choir room may mean we are temporarily on this earth and we are in a place of worship, singing, and prophecy. Buying our own materials probably refers to getting our study materials from the Lord directly-buying that which is freely given by Him. Chairs refer to being in a place of rest or in a position of quietness (Isaiah 30:15). Writing something just before the class started perhaps refers to the books I am writing for people. This dream may represent the individuals who read my books, (i.e. come into my class) and are flaming or on fire for the Lord. These are unknown people. Ten means measured for acceptance or rejection. Twelve means joined, united, united into common goals or purposes.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is about people reading my books and being united together as those on fire for the Lord. I am to be aware of them and pray for them.

DREAM ABOUT DRIVING IN A CONVERTIBLE ALONG WITH FEAR
* * * * * * * *

I saw myself driving a convertible car with the top down. Fear was also in the car represented by a rectangle shape [_______]. It was positioned in back of me in the car. I drove by two times, one each direction: one time going right, one time going left from where I observed this action. I seemed to be observing this from the side, yet I seemed to also see myself in the car along with this rectangle shape. Then I saw the car going left again. This time the rectangle for fear was in front of me, instead of behind me, in the car.

The point of the dream seems to be the change of position of the fear rectangle. From the position I was observing this car, it seems this picture of the car and fear was something I needed to see or was seeing, perhaps to learn something about myself. The car represents my life. Going right may represent going in the natural direction. Going left may represent going in the spiritual direction. Having the fear rectangle in back of me may represent fear coming from my past experiences and/or may mean I didn’t see it or recognize it as a substance or person or spirit as being with me in my journey.

Seeing fear in front of me in the car going left (spiritual direction) may mean I now see it from a spiritual viewpoint, and am aware of its being there, therefore I have the opportunity to do something about it. 

After I awoke from this dream and wrote it down, the information from yesterday reviewed through my mind again. That information is that I can handle fear in three ways: 
1.	Rebuke it 
2.	If I embrace it and let it influence me, then I need to confess that as sin, repent of it, and turn away from it 
3.	Confront it with the Word of God. 

So perhaps this dream is showing me (I am observing) that I now have fear exposed: by being in a convertible, and by its being in front of my view. Therefore I can take measures to deal with it. If that is the correct interpretation, then this is a very positive dream

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that fear in my life journey is now exposed and can therefore be dealt with in the ways He taught me.

JOURNAL 5-13-05 Friday

A DREAM ABOUT LOOKING AT CERAMIC FLOWERS IN A SALE
* * * * * * * *

I was in a building looking over items that were on display, rather like a garage sale. I saw lots of large ceramic-like decorative stuff, like flowers, for using inside a house. It seemed like these flowers etc. belonged to K and R.

I also looked at ladies’ clothing and saw several pretty dresses and tops. Then I saw two ladies dressed in shimmery mauve dresses which I thought were really pretty.

I am your covering (dress) and I have “separated you out” (two) for a beautiful memorable day (mauve and shimmery). Unknown women (angels) will be functioning in your life today.

The house represents you and I am bringing you “decorative items” for inside you and colorful decorative clothes for you to wear – in bountiful supply. Your “covering” will be seen by others as abundant and pretty—pleasing to the eyes. This is because of the “loving” work you will do.

Trust Me. This is coming. It’s on its way to you. You didn’t see yourself purchase anything because I am giving it to you—by My grace.

K and R are an example of a Christian loving couple—and you and I (Bride and Bridegroom) will function as a Christian loving couple. Doesn’t the husband have the role of being the provider? I am your Provider. You are in the house called "being on earth," and I am outside making preparations for all the provision you need to function while on earth. It’s My gift to My Bride.

Remember the vision at camp where you saw Me in front? That’s when I gave you the ability (imparting) to see and hear Me.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that He is putting things inside me and a covering over me that will be seen by others as doing “loving work” to them. He is my husband and is providing all I need to function while on earth.

JOURNAL 5-16-05 Monday

A DREAM ABOUT GOING TO BUY LITTLE CAKES
* * * * * * * *

In this dream I was going to buy little individual loaves of cupcakes to give as gifts to others.

This is a dream about me. These loaves were shaped like small loaves of bread except they were cake instead of regular bread. Perhaps these refer to sweet bread. Bread refers to Life or Word: doctrine, covenant, the Church, substance, provision (money, food, etc.) I am wondering if this dream refers to my desire and plan on how to use the money I expect the Lord to be bringing me soon. The plan is to help others as much as I can with it, after keeping what I need to pay my bills. I want to give to Christian ministries as the Lord leads, and I want to make some money available to the church leaders to give out to others they know have needs (as the disciples brought their money and laid it at the apostles’ feet for use by the early church). "Going to buy them” may refer to “buying them from the Lord" since He has all my accounts stored in heaven for me to draw on.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I will be “buying” sweet loaves to give to others. This could refer to actual monetary help, or it could refer to my books being sweet words to give out as gifts to others.

A DREAM ABOUT MIKE’S 8TH BIRTHDAY PARTY
* * * * * * * *

In this dream I saw M. at his birthday party. I asked him how old he was and he said he was 8 years old. I told him that was a wonderful age to be.

M. and I were the two characters in this dream. Perhaps M. refers to Beth since they were good friends in childhood and went to school together. So that may establish this dream as being about childhood experiences for Beth. Birthday party refers to a celebration of some important milestone/event in Beth’s or my life. And 8 refers to putting off the old man or the works of the flesh, and putting on the new life, new beginnings. Beth and I both are going through that process right now through Theophostic training and Jack Frost training.  It can refer to the beginning of a new era or order, and that is what I see happening in both our lives. Yes, it is a wonderful age to be!

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that Beth and/or I am going through a celebration time of putting off the old and putting on the new.

A DREAM ABOUT SOMEONE PUSHING DOWN ON MY HEAD AND SHOULDERS
* * * * * * * *

In this dream I was sitting down and someone was pushing down hard on my head and shoulders. He kept pushing and pushing and it seemed like all my insides were going to crush and break. I just sat there and felt this terrible oppression on me until I woke up. I felt immediately that it was a demonic oppression dream and it was trying to scare me.

When I awoke I began to rebuke that dream and what was causing it. I prayed for the blood of Jesus to cover me and prayed and declared Scriptures over myself. I bound that evil spirit and commanded it leave me and leave our house. I kept praying and binding until I was at peace and could go back to sleep again. I asked the Lord what it was that left an entryway for that evil spirit to come into our house and bother me with this dream. He told me it was from having a certain book in our house with a picture on the front of a Babylonian god symbol of an elongated cat. The book was about Daniel and his time and experiences in Babylon and it was written by Paul Yonggi Cho. I determined to take that book back to the library later today and get it out of the house.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is to be very careful what I have in our home because I don’t want anything which would allow evil spirits access to us. God is good and powerful to come and bring protection when we call upon Him.

JOURNAL 5-18-05 Wednesday

A DREAM ABOUT TEACHING CHILDREN WHAT TO DO
* * * * * * * *

In this dream I was teaching a classroom of children. They were about 8-9 years old. I was showing them how to cut out pictures of angels and arrange them into an artistic display in the room. I also had them drawing fall pictures of leaves, etc. and Christmas pictures. These were to be cut out and also put in artistic displays in the room.

I told them I wanted to be sure they knew what to do and how to do it—then it would be up to them as to whether they did it. They would not have an excuse for not doing the work (and therefore getting a failing grade) except they just didn’t do it. 

I looked out the window and saw the buses there to pick up the children and take them home, so it was almost time to leave. I asked another person what time they got on the buses and was told at 4:30. 

One boy said he couldn’t find his pencil. I told him that finding his pencil was his responsibility, not the teacher’s. 

Children represent those young in maturity. 8-9 years may refer to those with (8) a new beginning having put off the old self and put on the new, and (9) those in the harvest. Artistic display may refer to what you show in your life. These displays seemed to deal with angels, fall pictures, and Christmas pictures. They may refer to angelic activity during this coming fall and Christmas time. That would fit with something Bob Jones spoke at our church last Sunday about things happening this coming December. 

My concern toward these “children” was that they know very clearly what was needed to be done by them before they could get a passing grade. They would not have any excuse for not doing it except that they chose not to do it. This seems to refer to my making clear the steps to salvation or the steps to grow in their intimacy with Christ since this was about children being taught and learning the lessons being taught.

Seeing the buses there and asking what time it was refers to there not being much time left before we leave the earth and our lesson time is over. 4 refers to rule/reigning, and 30 refers to being measured for the purpose of accepting or rejecting their conformity to Christ.

Pencil refers to tongue: indelible words, covenant, agreement, contract, vow, publish, record, permanent, unforgettable, gossip. So perhaps this is saying to this boy that it was his responsibility to find the covenant he needed to do his work on earth. He needed to make his agreement with Christ. He could be taught how, but he needed to take the responsibility himself to do it.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I am in the business of teaching others (young in Christian maturity) about the steps they can take that will give them a good grade, a passing grade, that will qualify them for heavenly rewards. This could refer to the books I am writing. The dream also indicates the time is short before we leave earth and go “home.” The Lord wants me to know there is a purpose for the books with which I “teach” others and He will use them for that purpose.

JOURNAL 5-19-05 Thursday

Notes from The Believer’s Secret of the Abiding Presence compiled from the writings of Andrew Murray and Brother Lawrence by Louis Parkhurst, Jr.  (Minneapolis, MN, Bethany House Publishers, 1987):

"…to comfort the disciples, Christ gave them the promise of the Holy Spirit, with the assurance that they would then have Him (Christ himself) in His heavenly presence in a sense far deeper and more intimate than they had ever known on earth….being with Him, living in unbroken fellowship with Him, would give them the secret power by which they would preach and tell others about Him.

"For all time, this principle remains valid for all His servants. Without the experience of His presence always abiding with them, their preaching will have no power. The secret of their effectiveness will be the living demonstration that Jesus Christ is with them every moment, inspiring, directing, and strengthening them….Through a living faith, the Christians’ success in his work depends upon his consciousness of the abiding presence of the Lord Jesus with him.

"Establish a sense of God’s presence in your life by continually conversing with Him."

* * * * * * * *

In my soaking time with the Lord this morning, He is again reaffirming that He loves me and that He loved me even before I was born, all the time I was in the womb, and all through my lifetime. He reminds me today, as I sit in front of a window and soak in the quietness and peace outside, of the times as a child and youth when I worked in the family garden during the quietness and peace of the early morning hours…and He was with me then even as He is today. He taught me to enjoy and desire the quietness of being with Him, and gradually taught me to listen to Him communicate with me. He was preparing me even then for the listening and writing He is having me do now. He says this listening and writing is my destiny.

JOURNAL 5-23-05 Monday

From Friday 5-20 through Sunday 5-22 I attended the Jack Frost Conference at CTC. It was wonderful! I recommend his material and especially his speaking to others. He shares primarily about how to come to know and understand the Father’s love, what things keep you from experiencing it, and prays prayers that help release you from the barriers to receiving it.

A DREAM ABOUT VISITING AN APARTMENT BUILDING BUILT ON A STEEP HILL
* * * * * * * *

1. In this dream my brother and my daughters and I drove in a car to visit an apartment house that seemed to be built on a steep hill. As we drove up in front of it, I looked up at it and saw that we needed to climb lots of steps to get up to the entrance door. The steps were gray cement, maybe 10 or so steps. At the top of the steps was this red brick old looking building.

2. When we went inside I saw clear plastic containers like might be used for mail, etc. and saw newspapers folded up and stuck in these containers fastened on the wall. We weren’t sure of the name of the person we came to visit, so we looked at these containers and saw the name: Carol MacDonald. That seemed to be the person we were to go visit. She lived on the second floor level and we were on the first floor at this time.

3. As we waited to get an elevator to the second floor, I looked out the back windows of the building and could see how steep a hillside this building was on—almost like it was balancing with the middle of the building on the hillside. It was a wonder to me that it could be that way. 
               ______\___________
Front    [              \                     ]    Back of building
            [                \                    ]    
            [ ________\_________ ]  
                                \
                             Hillside

4. Inside the building we saw a bunch of pipes or tubes or connections coming out of a wall and hanging down a ways.

5. I said the apartment building was very old and maybe they had had to put new pipes in sometime to update them.

6. The girls and I sat waiting at a table while my brother was seeing when the elevator would be available to take us up. We didn’t know if Carol would be home and it seemed that we didn’t know her or hadn’t met her before. I wondered if we should have called first. I don’t know why we went there to see her.

1.	Old house: person or family, past, inheritance, e.g. one’s Grandparent’s religion, ways, or temperament. Brother: self, spiritual brother, natural brother. Apartment house: rented from someone else. Built on a steep hill may refer to being built in instability, not on level ground, not solid and stable. Steps up may refer to steps as in a process, sometimes including the process of time. This could be symbolizing going through a process to learn about my ancestors’ temperaments and how those might be affecting me. My spiritual brother may refer to Jack Frost who taught us about looking into that past for clues to ourselves. He took me there in (a car—his ministry) the conference talks he gave. Gray may refer to those steps being hazy, hidden, or confusing. A red brick old looking building could well refer to my past relatives. Red: (+) wisdom, (-) anger. I think there was a lot of anger coming from my Whitacre ancestors. I think of brick as being stiff, inflexible, and scratchy…like some of those relatives were. "We went to the entrance" may refer to Christ, new opportunity, or way. To some extent where I go I take my children because who I am influences them. This dream could be a revelation dream.

2.	Newspapers refer to announcement, important event, public exposure, news. Since these were put in clear plastic containers this might also refer to this news being open to view.  In this dream we didn’t know the person we came to “visit,” so this may represent someone or people in my past who influenced me but whom I don’t know (like my Grandmother Whitacre, and Grandmother Peters). Since she lived on the floor above us, this might refer to her being a person who is currently dead (on the second floor) while we are alive (on the first floor). We didn’t know her and she didn’t know us and wasn’t expecting to see us. I wonder what Carol MacDonald means! Carol means "song of joy" and MacDonald means "child of the great ruler." Carol could be referring to a Christmas carol, a song of joy about the birth of Christ. Through Christ being born inside a person, that person becomes a child of the great ruler.

3.	We were waiting to “go up” to see this unknown person. "I looked out the back windows" may refer to looking for revelation from the past. What I saw there was showing what a very unstable and precarious place this building was situated on. The front looked ok and stable and solid, but the back (past) showed that it was not stable or solidly situated.

4.	Pipes: carrier of something, perhaps water (Spirit) So inside this building representing my ancestry, there was something carrying the Spirit showing there

5.	New pipes may refer to new attitudes, new thinking, new revelations of the Spirit were put there.

6.	Table: communion, agreement, conference, covenant, provision. I was at this table with my children while my spiritual brother was seeing about something to take us up to meet and get to know Carol, a person representing someone from my past, whom we were to meet but we didn’t know why.

What the Lord has shown me here is a picture of my being guided to looking into my past ancestry to try to discover the Spiritual influence there and how that affects me now.

JOURNAL 5-24-05 Tuesday

“My food,” said Jesus, “is to do the will of him who sent me and to finish his work. Do you not say, ‘Four months more and then the harvest’? I tell you, open your eyes and look at the fields! They are ripe for harvest. Even now the reaper draws his wages, even now he harvests the crop for eternal life, so that the sower and the reaper may be glad together. Thus the saying ‘One sows and another reaps’ is true. I sent you to reap what you have not worked for. Others have done the hard work, and you have reaped the benefits of their labor.”  (John 4:34-38)

Lord, I want to do the will of You who called me and sent me…and I want to finish the work you have specifically for me! You said that You are the author and finisher of my faith, and You said that the good work You have begun in me You will be faithful to finish. I ask You and trust You to do that today, Lord. Whatever part of the work You are doing in and through me today, let it be done in Your Name!

I hear this, and I know the pulling on your heart today to come to Me and to seek Me. You have taken a little vacation to go to the Jack Frost conference, and now it is time to “come home” to Me in the Secret Place today. Your home is your Secret Place. That is where you and I meet together. I am your “home” and I am your Father and Mother within that home. It is a place of safety and security, of love and acceptance, of guidance and counsel.

You are doing My will when you set yourself apart unto Me and listen to Me and write what I show you to write—like now. You are doing My will for you right now. And I will see to it you finish the work I have for you.

The soaking time is good and it quiets your heart and body and gets you ready to listen to Me, but THIS is what I have for you each day—listening to Me, reading My Word, writing what I put in your heart to write…and putting it in books for others to read eventually. You don’t need to tell your readers what Jack Frost says, or what Todd Bentley says, or what others say, but WHAT I SAY! That is my task for you, to listen to Me and write what I say to you. And then to put that in a form that others may read it later too.

A MESSAGE FROM THE LORD TO THE READERS OF THIS BOOK
* * * * * * * *

Oh dear readers of Joan’s material: I love you and am thinking of you even now as she writes this for Me. I want you to know that you are in My heart and My thoughts even if you are not yet born into this world. This is a message for whoever reads this material. I know you and I care about you very much! Receive My love. Accept My love. Receive Me into your life. I want you to be Mine, just as Joan is Mine. Will you do that today? Then call to Me and tell Me you want Me to be in your life. Tell Me you believe in Me and want Me to be your Savior and Lord, just as I am Joan’s Savior and Lord. Tell Me. I want to hear it from you. Then you will be Mine, and I will come to you and live inside you as I do in Joan.

A VISION ABOUT PLANTING AND HARVESTING TIME
* * * * * * * *

I saw a picture vision of a farmer driving a tractor-planter. As he drove along, the machine had equipment on it to dig a furrow, then something that dropped the corn seed into the furrow, then something that covered over the seed row. So the planting took a short time to cover a lot of space.

Then the memory came back of Hans Brumbaugh in Centennial planting his fields by hand and having Japanese workers help him plant and harvest it all by hand, slowly, and with lots of back- aching work.

NOW the seed is sown quickly and harvested quickly. In the past it was sown slowly and harvested slowly with lots of back-aching work. The growing time and need of sun and water is still the same.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is this is a revelation about how the sowing and harvesting spiritually is now happening much much faster than a long time ago. It takes less time and more is planted and harvested in that time. This is how it is in these end times.

JOURNAL 5-25-05 Wednesday

A DREAM ABOUT FLAMES ON THE STOVE TOP THAT I COULDN’T PUT OUT
* * * * * * * *

In this dream I was in a room (perhaps a bedroom) where there was a stove with four burners. The burners had flames coming from them (like a gas stove) and I kept trying to get the flames turned out—and couldn’t. I went into the kitchen to tell the lady whose house it was. She showed me that the kitchen stove was also burning, but she could adjust that stove and turn the flames out. But she tried to explain something about the level of gas (oil in the dream) and how that affected the other stove so it wouldn’t go out. It didn’t seem to concern her to have live flames on in her house unattended all the time. I was one of a number of people in this dream. We seemed to be staying at this lady’s home for awhile.

I am a participant. This dream is about me. It involves what is going on in my life regarding the oil of the Spirit and the flames burning high and brightly in my room (Secret Place) of intimacy with the Lord. I cannot put those flames out because they are being affected and determined by a different stove and the oil level in it–the stove in the kitchen in me representing my heart and intent. I am informed about this level of oil and how it affects the flames by a messenger from God. She lets me know my heart is determining the level of oil in my place of rest and intimacy with God. There are other women involved in the scenes, but I am the person taking the action. This seems to be a dream revealing my heart condition and how it affects ruling and reigning over the world and in the kingdom.

That is right. This dream tells you that your heart flame is burning brightly and you can’t put it out because it is regulated by your heart’s desire and intent. You and I are burning brightly together as the oil represents Me. This is a self-position dream—showing what is happening inside you and in your life right now. It is good.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is my heart condition and how it affects ruling and reigning in the world and kingdom. The oil level is high and the flames are burning brightly and cannot be put out.

A DREAM ABOUT VISITING A RETREAT PLACE
* * * * * * * *

Someone and I were visiting a retreat-like place situated back in the woods and snowy pathway from the main road. I could see the entranceway into the woods while standing at the road, but couldn’t see the way to get to the auditorium from the road. It seemed we needed to go back the snowy pathway, then would be shown how to get to the auditorium. We had been there previously so I knew about it. 

I watched a car trying to come down the road across a small valley from where I stood. It was so steep the car kept starting down, pushed on its brakes, started down again, pushed on its brakes again, etc. to try to descend the steep road.

In this dream I was observing things around me. No one else was in the dream except the driver of the car I watched. So this dream refers to me. It seems to be revealing to me something about me and where I am now. 

I am waiting to enter a snowy unrevealed/unfulfilled (but pure/grace) pathway. This pathway is covered by trees representing a shelter/leader/person over me along this pathway. It leads to a retreat place (the Secret Place). When I get to that place then I will also find my way to an auditorium (representing a large roomy place). I see a car (life/person/ministry) going down a mountain (exalted place, difficult place) and using the brakes to stop the speed of the downward drive (stops, hindrances, waits).

v
What the Lord has shown me here is a picture of myself about to enter a sheltered pathway to retreat and come into a large roomy place. But I also stop the speed of the journey with hindrances and waiting.

A DREAM ABOUT LOOKING AT DECAL-LIKE PATTERNS
* * * * * * * *

A group of us women were together in a room and looking at pictures of decal-like patterns which could be put on something for us. We were looking at the patterns to try to pick the one we wanted for ourselves. They were colorful and pretty, almost like Disney characters.

A group of women which included me may refer to angels or people of like spirit with me. We are viewing pictures of patterns we can choose to put on us or our clothes. Disney characters may refer to animated characters that are fun and that display individual characteristics. Other pictures may have been such things as flowers, fruit, etc. The idea was that we liked the patterns/pictures and we could pick one/some for ourselves. This dream may be showing me I can pick out what I want to be and choose it, and I get to have it.

v
What the Lord has shown me here is that I can look at characteristics I want to have, and can choose them, and they will be given to me. I can put them on myself, my covering.

What characteristics do I choose?
I want to love You and others with Your love, Father.
I want to fulfill that for which You put me on earth as Jesus did.
I want to do what I see You doing as Jesus did.
I want to say what I hear You saying as Jesus did.
I want to know You closely and intimately day by day for all of my earth life.
I want the fellowship of the Holy Spirit every moment of my life.
I want to please You as Jesus did.

JOURNAL 5-26-05 Thursday

A DREAM ABOUT THREE PROPHETIC CARRIERS
* * * * * * * *

In this dream I saw myself and two others as prophetic carriers. We could tell which of us had the answer because of a vegetable picture which showed up on the person who had the answer.

This dream seems to indicate there are various kinds of prophetic carriers of the gift of prophecy. Some carry one kind of fruit of his/her labor, another carries another kind of fruit of his/her labor. But all three here carry some kind of fruit which is visible even though different from others. Three prophetic carriers may not refer to an exact number but the nature of those carriers: conformed to the image of Christ, in obedience to Him, and in His likeness.

I was a participant along with others. This dream seems to be assuring me that there are various kinds of prophetic carriers and each kind can be used to help people with needs that match that gifting. To me this is an affirmation that I am one of the “prophetic carriers” and, therefore, what I carry can be an answer to someone’s need.

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What the Lord has shown me here is that there are various kinds of prophetic carriers, and different ones carry different fruit that help answer needs in other’s lives. I am one of those carriers. 

A DREAM ABOUT MAKING PREPARATIONS TO GO ON A TRIP
* * * * * * * *

A whole group of people, including me, was making preparations to go on a trip. Some were going to fly, some were driving. I was with those who were flying. We were discussing the food we would need to take along. One food item was ice cream cones. I tasted one from some old ones to see if it was ok to still use it, and it was ok.

This dream could be referring to my church. It is “going someplace” from where it now is. The whole group may refer to those who attend CTC. I am in the dream as part of this whole group, a participant. Some people were flying—moved by the Spirit, operating in the gifts of the Spirit. Some people were driving—ministry through their lives/person. One thing we were taking along for use on the trip was that which would be a comfort to those who received it. We had the “containers” for this comfort.

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What the Lord has shown me here is that CTC is going on, going somewhere beyond where it is now, in using our Spiritual gifts and personal ministry as moved by the Spirit to bring comfort to others where we go.

JOURNAL 5-27-05 Friday

You have waited through a rather dry time in writing. Now I will be having more to speak to you and you will have more to write from now on. This has been a testing time to see if you would REALLY stand on the word I have given you to spend your time listening to Me and writing what I tell you to write. I give you a 100%. You have been fully tested and approved. Now let’s write more daily, ok?

Today I sent you into a quiet time with music and praise. Some days I take you into Quiet Time with quiet; some days with Bible reading. And some days I take you right to writing what I am speaking into your heart. Each day may be different. Don’t expect a new day to be the same as the previous day, as I am a God of infinite variety.

This is a good day. In fact, this is a great day. It is one day closer to the harvest of My people being finished and one day closer to the Rapture. Rejoice in that! I am looking forward to that Rapture more than you are, and I know you are looking forward to it a lot.

A DREAM ABOUT SWIMMING ON A TOWEL
* * * * * * * *

In this dream another girl (I don’t know who) and I were swimming together. She showed me to put my towel down on the surface of the water and lie on that since the water was so cold, so I did that too. She brought us swim skirts which were white short skirts with waterproof plastic underpants attached inside the white outer skirts. We wore halter tops with the skirts. It seemed like G. was at or near the pool also, but not swimming. When I woke up the song in my mind was “It’s almost like being in love.”

That was an angel with you, showing you how to manage in the cold water. Look up water and cold and towel and see what they symbolize. Then white skirts and halter tops. Note that G. was NOT swimming like you and the angel were. It’s the SWIMMING that’s almost like being in love—which includes love, trust, caring, holding the other up, etc. Yet your swimming water was cold. What does that mean?

Sometimes the spirit (attitude) prevalent in the world is like cold water and difficult to be immersed in. so the angel is showing me how to function in that cold world. It involves serving God (swimming) using the help of a towel (to help keep me above the coldness in the world’s attitudes). It involves receiving a pure, righteous covering and grace which is “waterproof” to again be protection from the cold water. It involves a righteous covering and attitude over my heart. This angel may represent my own personal angel that goes with me everywhere I go. The cold water may show a trial or test in the spiritual area. Perhaps that trial or test was associated with G. Since he is not swimming, I think that means he is not serving God and involved in spiritual activities even though he had the opportunity to do so. He may represent himself in this dream since he has been in my mind lately. Or he may represent people who know about salvation, but choose a different way than the Bible teaches. The song seems to mean that swimming with the Lord is similar to being “in love” here on earth. 

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What the Lord has shown me here is that my angel is helping me cope with difficulties in this world as I seek to participate in the activities of God and serve Him.

A DREAM ABOUT SWEEPING LEAVES
* * * * * * * *

I was in a room in a building somewhere not familiar. I seemed to be a church secretary. At first I was lying down resting. Later I was sitting at a desk. There were leaves scattered around on the floor and I felt I should sweep them up—that it was my job to do that. A man came in, seemed like the pastor (almost like P), and had a broom with him. I pulled on one end of the broom and he on the other until he let me have it so I could sweep the leaves. This seemed to be a fun game-like thing to do—pulling on the broom.

Church secretary may refer to being one who assists the pastor in the work of the church. At first I was resting (salvation, meditation, intimacy, peace). Then I was sitting at a desk. Sitting on a chair might indicate rest or position/quietness. The broom P and I tugged on may represent our both being aware of cleaning that needed to be done in that place—there were changes that needed to be made and obstacles that needed to be removed. The leaves may represent the words spoken or doctrines believed that needed to be cleaned. It seemed to indicate we enjoyed working together doing this. 

Interesting that I should dream about G and P both in a dream sequence during a 6- hour period of time or so. They both represented tests/trials that I had to deal with and I really liked working with both of them. Perhaps working at that church was like trying to swim in “cold water” and needing to “sweep up” things that needed cleaning up. It surely seems like that now from today’s perspective. Well, Lord, did I make it through those two trial times in my life ok?

Yes, you did. You went through a lot of grief and difficulty there, including all three pastors, and others too. It was a time of building character in you. It was all used for your good, even though it was like swimming in cold water (not very pleasant spiritual atmosphere) and having a mess to clean up. You followed Me through it all. I honor you for that.

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What the Lord has shown me here is that I went through a time of trials and difficulties during my 20 years of time spent at that church and it was rather like swimming in cold water or needing to sweep out and clean things.

JOURNAL 5-29-05 Sunday

The Lord impressed me to read Joshua 5:9

Then the Lord said to Joshua, “Today I have rolled away the reproach of Egypt from you.” So the place has been called Gilgal to this day. On the evening of the fourteenth day of the month, while camped at Gilgal on the plains of Jericho, the Israelites celebrated the Passover. The day after the Passover, that very day, they ate some of the produce of the land: unleavened bread and roasted grain. The manna stopped the day after they ate this food from the land; there was no longer any manna for the Israelites, but that year they ate of the produce of Canaan.  (Joshua 5:9-12)

There came a time when they ate of the produce of the land, the Promised Land. That time will come for you also. There will be a day (that very day) when you will eat of the produce of the Promised Land I have for you.

A DREAM ABOUT STRETCHING OUT A WORD TO EXPAND ITS MEANING
* * * * * * * *

In this dream I could look at some trait or word which I saw in front of me. It was something describing myself or perhaps others. Somehow I could cause it to activate something which would show how it was to the right and left of that word/trait. It was rather like the extension to the right and left showed the full continuum--or how far that trait could extend and what that extension would be like. It was like the word would stretch out and reveal information about the possibilities in me/us. I did this over and over, fascinated by being able to do this.

	  O  

I think the word or trait refers to me and I am being shown how I can be stretched out to the right and left and reveal more possibilities within me. This is fascinating to watch happen and see the possibilities I have not seen before.

And that refers to your books also. They are an extension of you, they are "you in print." Those books will stretch out to the right and to the left to an extent you don't even envision or imagine yet. I will do it all!

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What the Lord has shown me here is that I (and my books) will both be stretched out farther to the left and right that I can even imagine. He will do it all.

A DREAM ABOUT TRYING TO GET A BUS HOME
* * * * * * * *

I was trying to get a bus home to the New Haven house. I said I had no credit card to use to pay for the bus fare but I could pay cash or check. The cost of the ticket was $20. I specifically asked if the bus went 2 miles east of NH on Hwy 30. The bus driver said he brought boxes of merchandise to a neighbor near us. He tore a picture out of a newspaper of that person’s ad selling merchandise. It was the 7th month, but I think it was October. It seemed like I saw two different bus possibilities and wanted to be sure I got the right one.

A bus may refer to sojourners or Christians. Being a passenger on a bus may refer to myself, a church member, or a family member. Since this bus was going “home” it may refer to going to heaven. You don’t go to heaven on a credit card, but I could pay cash or a check. This could refer to the cost of the ticket already being in my possession (i.e. purchased by Jesus Christ and given to me as a free gift of salvation). Twenty refers to holy, tried and approved. Since there were two bus possibilities in this dream that could refer to two possible destinations (heaven and hell). I wanted to be sure I was on the bus leading to my specific home (heaven where my “Father” is). A newspaper refers to an announcement of an important event, public exposure, news, prophecy. So this reference to a newspaper in the dream may mean this is an important event that will get public exposure and be seen by many. The 7th month could refer to completion, finished. October is the 10th month on our calendar, so I’m not sure what that would mean. Perhaps it shows me the month of my death or rapture.

You are in this dream and looking at the two buses—the two destinations. You want to announce this event to the world through the newspaper ad your “neighbor” uses. Your “neighbors” are those who live in the same area you do…they are your fellow Christians. This is a good dream, a positive dream. It is showing you the time is near and is already specific in My plans. It is the time of the “completion or finishing” of My Church, My Bride. You have definitely got the money for the ticket in your life. Your Father is ready for you to come home, and I am ready for you to come home…and you are ready to come too. This dream will be like a “newspaper ad” in your book telling others where you went.

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What the Lord has shown me in this dream is that the time of the Rapture is near and already set in His plans…and that I already have the money for my ticket to go home.

A DREAM ABOUT TAKING CLASSES
* * * * * * * *

I seemed to be taking classes like maybe at a school/college. I said to someone that I didn’t get to start on a couple of the classes I thought I was going to take because I missed the first days of class, perhaps due to illness or some such thing. So I didn’t go to those classes since I missed the beginning. I said I needed to check the amount I had paid for the tuition because I may have been billed and already paid for them. I said I was concerned I might not graduate without having those classes.

I would hear voices and follow the direction of those voices and find a couple of people who were working on something—perhaps underwater or in some rather hidden place. They wondered how I found them and I said I heard their voices and followed that.

School refers to teaching or learning, Church, people or work, teaching ministry, training. Taking classes may mean I was studying things at this “school” leading toward graduation. Graduation may refer to the time I am finished attending this learning situation and would be ready to go out in ministry. Since I view our time of living on this earth as attending classes and learning lessons God wants to teach us, I think this dream is a “self condition” dream showing me my condition. It shows I missed some of the classes I was planning to take due to something, perhaps illness. I may have “paid for” those classes but didn’t attend them. All this makes me think about the many things I am learning right now at CTC through the special “courses” offered there. I feel there is still so much yet to learn and I did not learn those things in my previous church experiences like I am here at CTC. I wonder if I will ever “catch up” with others in the class and have learned enough to be ready to graduate and minister to others.

That’s it, that’s what this dream is about. You have learned a lot, but still have so much yet to learn—that is the way you feel right now. You wonder what is the best way to attend and learn all you need to know. W gave you the answer yesterday when he said he had to just step out and do it and trust the Lord to show him and give him what to do and say. That was a word for you through him yesterday. He said it for you.

I am showing you in this dream that your ministry to others will come through listening to the voices of others. Through this you will learn where they are working or hiding. As you hear them speak their needs, you can minister to them through prayer, speaking, etc. as I lead you…as you trust Me to give you what to say and do as W mentioned.

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What the Lord has shown me here is that I see myself as not having all the training I need to be fully ready to do ministry to others, but that I am to listen to their voices to learn where they are and what they need ministry with.

JOURNAL 5-30-05 Monday (Memorial Day)

Today I remember Mom and Dad and Virginia from my immediate family. I remember how we used to take flowers to Virginia’s grave at the cemetery on Memorial Day when I was young. If I lived close enough I would want to visit all three of their graves today. I remember especially Aunt Lillie and Uncle Carl today also who were so special to me. I’m glad our country takes a day apart to remember those who have died, especially those who have given their lives in battle. I’m thankful that none of my 3 brothers, who were all in the military service, were killed or wounded in battle.

Thank You, God, for having me be born in America where we have freedom to learn about You and to worship You. Thank You for the good friends you have given us at our church, CTC. Thank you for the people we got to eat lunch with yesterday. I like them so much!

A DREAM ABOUT SERVING LUNCH TO WOMEN IN MY HOUSE
* * * * * * * *

In this dream a group of women were in my house having lunch. I arranged the chairs in a large circle so we could all see each other as we ate. A couple of the women pulled their chairs in close to one end of the circle to make a smaller group to the exclusion of others. I told them we had to change the chair positions so we could all be in a large circle.

Eating refers to partaking: participating, experiencing, and fellowship. Chairs refer to resting together. A circle could symbolize spiritual, grace, mercy, compassion, and forgiveness. All of this seems to show this group as a spiritual group fellowshipping together. The two women putting their chairs close to part of the circle seems to show their forming a small group within the larger group and excluding others. My action was to instruct the group about sharing with this whole group instead. In this dream I seemed to be the person hosting the group so I was a participant, but mostly I was observing the group. I didn’t see myself as part of the circle, but as the one putting the furniture into the circle so others could sit there. So, in that sense, I was observing.

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What the Lord has shown me here is a picture of myself being hostess to a Christian fellowship group and feeding them and helping them relate to the whole group, not just a few.

A DREAM ABOUT JESUS INTRODUCING ME TO OTHERS THROUGH MY BOOKS
* * * * * * * *

A man and I were walking across a field toward some people. He said to those people as we approached, “I’ve come with a friend of mine from out of state.” I was the “friend” he was referring to.

An unknown man may represent Christ or an angel. A field may represent the world, God’s work, or the harvest. I was the friend he was introducing to others. Out of state could refer to being out of their part of the country, but perhaps it could mean someone out of where they lived. This dream may refer to Christ introducing me through my books to people (whom I didn’t see in the dream) sometime after the Rapture.

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What the Lord has shown me here is a picture of how He will introduce me as His friend to others who don’t live where I do.

A DREAM ABOUT BETH ASKING IF IT IS TURKEY DAY
* * * * * * * *

Beth said, “Mom, is it turkey day?”

Turkey day refers to Thanksgiving day. I have two ideas about what that might mean. One, a day when we are finished with our harvesting labor on earth and are up in heaven feasting with Jesus, and are giving thanks to Him. The second idea is the vision picture of a turkey the Lord gave me years ago. This turkey tail was spread out like a fan and on each piece there was an instruction for someone in the body of Christ. My piece said, “Follow Me.” So this idea may refer to the question: “Is it the day to follow Him yet?”

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What the Lord has shown me here is a question to help me think about Thanksgiving Day in heaven coming soon, and about my direction from Him being to follow Him.

JOURNAL 5-31-05 Tuesday

A DREAM ABOUT VIOLETS BLOOMING
* * * * * * * *

I went out the front door of a house and into the front yard. This was not a familiar house or yard. In the front yard there were plants growing that I thought might be violets—one of my very favorite flowers. I became very excited to realize that they were blooming. I stepped carefully through the plants and over them until I came to the sidewalk. Before I looked at the flowers I stopped and thanked the Lord for the violets. I said something like, “It’s time for the violets to bloom!” Then I turned to look at the violets so that the sun just coming up in the east was shining on them. I saw many light green plants blooming with purple violets. I specifically saw one that had violets with white edging or striping on them—something I hadn’t seen before. So these violets almost seemed like a new variety not previously known to me.

I heard a cat meow. Then I saw this animal come trotting toward me that sounded like a cat, but looked like a cross between a cat, a dog, and maybe something else too. It was about the size of a full-grown collie dog. Its face was elongated like a collie or shepherd dog, but not shaped quite the same—more like an elongated snout. It was dark gray in color but had some white edging around several layers that were on its back. It looked mangy and ugly to me. I shook my head no and/or said no, and it turned and trotted away. I realized I had seen this same animal previously in a dream during the same night, but had forgotten that dream by then. It didn’t seem threatening, but rather like a lost animal looking for someone to take it in and take care of it. 

This is one I want to interpret for you. Violets (flowers) refer to “glory.” Since this is one of your very favorite flowers, it especially symbolizes My glory to you. That’s why in the dream you stopped to thank Me even before you took time to look closely at the flowers—with the eastern sun shining on them. The eastern sun shining refers to the beginning (of the day) of God’s light shining on the revelation of His glory (the flowers). And these flowers are purple and white—royalty and purity, with green leaves—life. Your words express the meaning of the dream—it’s time for the violets to bloom (it’s time for God’s light to shine on the revelation of His glory which is royal, pure and life. Since this dream took place in the front yard it means this is the present or future in timing. Violets in your life heralded the beginning of a new season—spring. This dream shows the beginning of a new season of spiritual growth of My visible glory in My people.

What does the second part about the animal mean, Lord?

The animal represents something you’ve never seen before. Its appearance put you off and you didn’t want to deal with it. Its sound was of a cat’s meow so it came presenting itself as if it were a cat, but it wasn’t; it didn’t look anything like a cat. It had an appearance you couldn’t identify. It was something you had never seen before in your life or in pictures. It almost looked like a combination of a dog, a pig, a weasel, and yet not any of them. The hump-like things on its back could represent something from the past that is hidden from sight. Its color, gray, refers to not defined and unclear and the white fringe on the hump-like things could represent purity or giving the appearance of purity. Whatever it was, whatever it represented, you rejected it, and it turned and left you. So this could be referring to the things from your past with which you have been dealing recently and which you sent away—even though it sounded like something precious. This could even refer to a generational “animal” from the past that wanted to come into the present or future, and you told it no…and it left you. This animal represents a whole conglomeration of things handed down to you generationally from your ancestors, things you don’t even recognize. You have now said no to these generational things and they have left. This is a dream to show you your current and future condition. This is good.

Interesting that You would put those two things together in this dream, Lord.

They both deal with the condition of you and your life right now and in the future.

When I awoke from this dream the song that kept going through my head was “I’m making melody in my heart to You.”

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What the Lord has shown me here is that it is the beginning time of His light shining on the revelation of His glory and the beginning of a new season of the spiritual growth of His visible glory in His people. Also the dream shows things from my ancestors which try to come into this picture of the future and are rejected and leave.

A PARABLE ABOUT A BUTTERFLY
* * * * * * * *

There once was a little butterfly born into the world. It looked around and saw people doing many different things and saw animals and birds going many places. “Why am I here?” he thought; “What am I supposed to do?” He flew around until he saw another butterfly that looked similar to him and he asked it, “Why am I here, and what am I supposed to do?” 

The other butterfly, much older and wiser, said, “Why, you are supposed to fly through the air and enjoy the sunshine, and flit from flower to flower, just to look pretty. Many people will come to look at you and admire you. They will then think about God and what He is like and how bountifully He has blessed them. You are to declare God's glory in what you do every day. That is your purpose for being born.” 

The little butterfly was delighted to hear this, and he said, “That’s what I will do every day of my life! I will fly around in the sunshine and flit from flower to flower, and show the beauty that God has given me. Then others will see this and praise God for His beautiful creation. They will then know there is a God who created me!”

A PARABLE ABOUT A FARMER AND HIS TWO DOGS
* * * * * * * *

There once was a farmer who had two dogs. One dog was a pet and one dog was a hunter. The farmer took the hunter dog with him to catch wild game for the family to eat.

One day the farmer took the pet dog with him when he went hunting. When the pet dog saw the wild game, it ran and hid in fear. It didn’t know what to make of the strange creatures. The farmer was at first upset with his pet, but then he realized the pet had not been trained as a hunter, so he couldn’t blame him for hiding.

The farmer said, “I will only take my trained hunter dog with me from now on and I’ll leave the pet dog at home where he feels safe. I love both my dogs and will use them only for what they are trained.”

You are a pet dog, and I love you as you are. I will only use you for what I’ve trained and equipped you for. And I surely have trained and equipped you for writing!

JOURNAL 6-1-05 Wednesday

A DREAM ABOUT KAY AND LOOKING AT GREETING CARDS
* * * * * * * *

In this dream K and I were in a house with other people (maybe only women) there too. It seems that we were drawing names for someone to give a gift to in a gift exchange. The names were on a list of stickers and we could pick the name we wanted. K chose my name and let me know that. I mentioned that she had had my name a couple of previous times also. Then I saw K looking at a pull-out picture ad which showed pictures of greeting card sets which could be ordered. She was looking to find a good set of cards to get for my gift. The ad she pulled open had really pretty cards in various colors and with nice pictures of drawings and flowers. I liked that set of cards too. I had not yet drawn a name off the list of stickers to give my gift to. I was thinking of possibly ordering a set of gift cards for the person whose name I drew.

A greeting card set might represent something to give to people in different circumstances (i.e. birthday, anniversary, thinking of you, get well, death, etc.) Since these were colorful and pretty they seem to represent giving something from God to cheer and encourage others. K was one of the best “encouragers” I ever had in my life. She was so thoughtful and aware of how I felt, and she reached out to me at a difficult time in my life. In this dream it seems significant that she chose me. I was made to feel special and liked because of that. That’s like she was in real life. Could she represent You, God? Are you showing me in this dream that I’m being picked out because I am special to You and that You are planning a special gift of encouragement to me which I then can use to encourage others?

Yes, that is a thought from Me. I have a gift I am preparing for you that you can then use to encourage and help others with. K represents your “best friend” which I am now in your life—your Best Friend. I have chosen you,  and I have a really neat gift for you. This is a dream to tell you about that gift coming. It is a prophetic dream to declare that. When it arrives, then you will know that it is the gift I showed you in this dream. You will be able to encourage many others with this gift and help build them up, knowing someone cares for them. You like to be an “encourager.” I have given you that gift a long time ago. This will be useful in furthering that gift. When it “arrives,” then you will “know.”

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What the Lord has shown me here is that He, as my Best Friend, has chosen me to give a special gift to. This gift will be useful for me to use in encouraging others.

A PARABLE ABOUT A BOY FINDING A TREASURE
* * * * * * * *

Once a little boy went into the woods to play. There he found a stone that he thought was beautiful. It sparkled like gold and glittered in the sunlight. He put the stone in his pocket and went running home to show his mother. “Look, mom, at the pretty stone I found! It is my treasure! I will keep it always and look at it and enjoy its beauty!” So the boy put the treasure in a special place in his bedroom and looked at it every day. So it is with treasures you find in life. Keep them in a place where you can view them and be reminded of them every day, so you won’t forget what is important to you.

SUPERNATURAL TRANSPORTATION FROM ONE PLACE TO ANOTHER
* * * * * * * *

When evening came, his disciples went down to the lake, where they got into a boat and set off across the lake for Capernaum. By now it was dark, and Jesus had not yet joined them. A strong wind was blowing and the waters grew rough. When they had rowed three or three and a half miles, they saw Jesus approaching the boat, walking on the water, and they were terrified. But he said to them, “It is I; don’t be afraid.” Then they were willing to take him into the boat, and immediately the boat reached the shore where they were heading.  (John 6:16-21)

As they traveled along the road, they came to some water and the eunuch said, “Look, here is water. Why shouldn’t I be baptized?” And he gave orders to stop the chariot. Then both Philip and the eunuch went down into the water and Philip baptized him. When they came up out of the water, the Spirit of the Lord suddenly took Philip away, and the eunuch did not see him again, but went on his way rejoicing. Philip, however, appeared at Azotus and traveled about, preaching the gospel in all the towns until he reached Caesarea. (Acts 8:36-40)

I heard a story the other day about a man who was in a car accident and was stuck in his car unable to get out by himself. It was a dangerous situation so he needed to get out of the car as soon as possible. Suddenly he found himself outside of the car and sitting along the road near it. Later when he was asked how he got out, he said he did not know how it happened; it just did.

When Enoch had lived 65 years, he became the father of Methuselah. And after he became the father of Methuselah, Enoch walked with God 300 years and had other sons and daughters. Altogether, Enoch lived 365 years. Enoch walked with God; then he was no more, because God took him away. (Genesis 5:21-24)

As they were walking along and talking together, suddenly a chariot of fire and horses of fire appeared and separated the two of them, and Elijah went up to heaven in a whirlwind. Elisha saw this and cried out, “My father! My father! The chariots and horsemen of Israel!” And Elisha saw him no more. Then he took hold of his own clothes and tore them apart. (2 Kings 2:11-12)

For some reason all these ideas are coming to me this morning which show supernatural transportation by God of human beings from one place to another. This is one of the many mysteries I wonder about. I have heard other current day stories of people finding themselves transported out of a wreck or dangerous place. It’s like they stepped into a different realm, a spiritual realm, where natural laws of the earth were superceded by spiritual laws of the different realm. This intrigues me. I want to know more about this spiritual realm which is so close to our natural realm. Ted Dekker has some books which refer to stepping into a spiritual realm temporarily.

JOURNAL 6-2-05 Thursday

INSTRUCTIONS FROM THE HOLY SPIRIT
* * * * * * * *

I am coming.

If you want to be one who sees and hears Me, you must “prepare ye the way of the Lord” as I say in My Word.

You do that by spending time with Me, focusing on Me, and listening for what I say, and being alert to (beholding) what I show you. This takes time and focused attention. It takes always putting Me first. I will always give you enough time for the other things you need to do (“and all these things shall be added unto you”). 

I love you and I want you to know what I’m doing.

There are things to do when you come up to heaven that you know not of. I have special work for you to do for Me here and I’m training you for it now—the best place to train you. Give up your divided heart and give Me an undivided heart now.

I will not let you miss anything I have for you if you will stay focused on Me and always keep Me first. Do not get involved in any ministry at your church unless I specifically lead you to do that—even if it is something that looks really interesting to you. Only if I lead you to. I want your time set apart for Me—to listen to Me and to watch Me and see what I am doing—and then to write it down for others to read sometime later. You are My messenger to them, so be a good and faithful messenger for Me.

A PARABLE ABOUT A BOY PLAYING PIANO
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Once there was a boy who played the piano. He really liked doing this and he gave his best quality time to this. His best time of the day was morning, so he gave all his morning to practicing and listening, and perfecting his skill. He grew and grew in his ability to play piano and wrote down all the music that he was given in his heart during these practice times. He became a faithful servant of the giver of his gift, and played for the giver skillfully and beautifully. He was content with his life for it fulfilled all his desires.

JOURNAL 6-4-05 Saturday

A DREAM ABOUT A MILITARY SECRET PROTECTING ME
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“Onox cuna” were the words in my mind in this dream. I knew this was the military secret that was protecting me, making me safe, and keeping me healed.

This seems to indicate that there is an unknown way, a secret way, being used to protect me and make me safe and keep me healed. It is something I do not understand because it isn’t in a language I understand.  Military secret reminds me of God’s angels fighting His battles for Him. They are secret to me because I do not see them.

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What the Lord has shown me here is there is a secret and unknown (by me) way He is keeping me protected and safe and healed through this revival time.

You do not need to know what this secret military thing is that I use to protect you, but just trust in Me always, knowing I am with you and aware of you and watching over you.

A DREAM ABOUT HELPING CHILDREN NEEDING HELP
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Some people were visiting us. One was a couple with a child whose toes turned back under when he tried to walk. I said J needed to examine the child and help determine what to do and see if J knew a doctor who could help that child. To get the child’s attention J crumpled a piece of paper, and then the child let J examine him. Another child had a problem too and J was helping the parents about what to do. They were happy they had come.

J, as my former husband, may represent Jesus, my true husband. When people come who need healing and help, Jesus is the one to examine and help them. They are like children looking to God for help. Jesus is helping parents know what to do for their children also. God is turning the hearts of the fathers to the children and the hearts of the children to the fathers.

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What the Lord has shown me here is how He will be looking after the various needs that will come to Him during the revival now upon the earth.

A DREAM ABOUT LETTERS ON CANS
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In this dream the letter W was on a can. The can represented the child of the mother. Another mother had WD on a can that represented her child.

A can is a container for food. Food is the Word of God, Jesus, manna from heaven. These cans represented children of mothers. God is our Father/Mother who gives out food to His children and through His children. Perhaps this dream represents food coming that is slightly different to different children, but all from the mother heart of God.

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What the Lord has shown me here is that during this revival now, and coming, food will come from God that will look a little bit different to different children.

A DREAM ABOUT TELEGRAMS BEING DELIVERED TO THE CHURCH OFFICE
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In this dream a telegram company began delivering telegrams for church members to the church office. I was trying to argue/convince the delivery woman they shouldn’t do that since those members weren’t at the church during the week but on Sunday. The telegrams each had a picture on them which included the recipient in the picture. One was for a person named Mary. The telegram spokesperson told me about needing to contact the person the telegram was for and getting the telegram to them. She also was trying to tell me I was to contact that person one year later to report on the telegram. The telegram lady kept arguing with me and not listening to my reasons why this was not a good plan. She would talk on the phone to someone else when I was trying to reason with her.

A telegram may refer to a fast form of communication from God to His people. These show a picture of a group; this may refer to a church, and the person receiving the telegram was part of that group. Perhaps that shows the people who belong to the Lord. If this unknown lady bringing the telegrams represents the Holy Spirit or an angel or Jesus, then it shows I am arguing and trying to be logical about these communications, and she/he wouldn’t listen to me but kept in communication with someone else by telephone. This dream seems to indicate that logic and reasoning are not applicable in the situation where the Holy Spirit is trying to deliver His message to His people. It makes me want to pray: “Show me the ways I might be trying to stop Your messages getting to your people, Lord, because they don’t seem logical to me.”

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What the Lord has shown me here is that I might be using logic to try to understand what the Holy Spirit is doing and that it won’t work.

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A song running in my head sometime during the night of these 4 dreams was “Let it Rain.”

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This would indicate these 4 dreams may have to do with the revival and pouring out of the Holy Spirit. 

A DREAM ABOUT SINGING MY LAST SOLO
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I was doing my last solo before a jury who would be judging it. I was third in line. I could see the printed schedule. The two who sang before me sat as they sang. I was wondering whether I should sit or stand. I was hoping to see the words as I sang.

This dream seems to be referring to my being in the final stage of singing my solo. Singing refers to worshiping proceeding from the heart. This is being observed by those who evaluate/judge all that I do and keep records in heaven. Being third may refer to being obedient and conforming to Jesus’ image. Sitting may represent resting and it seems I was not sure whether I was to be resting during this “last solo” or standing which might be the opposite of resting. "I was hoping to see the words to sing" may refer to looking day by day for the words/instructions the Lord gives me for that day and for writing.

v
What the Lord has shown me here represents this time now being the time I am singing my last song on this earth, my last time to be evaluated for my performance or what I do with the time given me. I am looking for instruction as to whether this time is to be spent resting (resting in the Lord) or standing (“having done all, stand”) and for the words to use in my last song.

JOURNAL 6-5-05 Sunday

A DREAM ABOUT GETTING NEW SUITS
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I was getting or looking at getting a new suit. My fiancé was also getting a new suit. We were trying to co-ordinate their colors so they would look good together.

My fiancé and other men (one seemed to be a high school friend) were trying on new suit possibilities and walking on a high counter/stage to show them off—like models might. 

This dream seems to be a prophetic picture showing my condition right now and of the future of getting a new covering along with my fiancé, Jesus. Our new coverings will look good together and co-ordinate. Jesus and others (including a friend who had gone to high school-advanced learning) were modeling their coverings or righteousness in their lives so others could view them.

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What the Lord has shown me here is the new coverings He and His own people have on now, and a picture of those coverings of righteousness from Him being modeled to others in the world.

A DREAM ABOUT HOUSES WHICH HAD WINDOWS BROKEN OUT
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I saw several houses (could they represent churches?) which had previously been lived in but now had windows broken out, etc. like maybe they had been hit by a bad storm. I was amazed because I had seen them and been inside one of them not too long ago. It looked like 1 house, out of 5 or so I saw, was still being lived in and had its windows intact. All these houses looked weathered and old and gray, unpainted.

When I woke up I just had the thought that these houses represented past churches I knew about or attended. Those churches seemed to be gray which represents being hidden, unclear, confusing, and hazy. They had people in them in my past experiences with them, but in this dream they have been hit by a storm and broken down…all but one.  This might be a prophetic dream showing storms coming to some churches and their being abandoned by the people who used to be in them. One church seemed to still have people in it.

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What the Lord has shown me here is a prophetic picture of many churches being hit by storms or something which causes destruction to them and causes them to be abandoned.

A DREAM ABOUT MEETING IN A CHURCH
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I was in a building, like maybe a church, with lots of rooms. I met with 1-2 men for a meeting. I tried to find a rest room stall where I could change clothes. When I put on different clothes the skirt was long and tight so it was hard to walk in. I wanted to change back. I seemed to be running out of time before I needed to return to my meeting with the man or men. I was walking down a hallway and a lady needed help fastening her dress in back. It had a weird large looking hook fastener and I wasn’t getting it to fasten right. A man came along and I let/asked him to help.

It seems the men I was meeting with were Jesus and Holy Spirit. A church with lots of rooms may represent the church having many issues. Changing clothes may represent changing my covering and I found it difficult to walk in the new garment. This may represent how restricted I felt trying to worship God at a place like a former church, and even, to some extent, another church, and I wanted freedom from the restrictions. What I really wanted and needed to do was to return to my meeting with Jesus and Holy Spirit. Since I couldn’t seem to help the person with putting on her covering, I asked Jesus/Holy Spirit to help her. She may represent others who are needing Him.

v
What the Lord has shown me here represents the difficulty of walking in a relationship with Jesus/Holy Spirit while in a church with many different issues than those of His. 

JOURNAL 6-6-05 Monday

A DREAM ABOUT A COMIC STRIP BULLETIN
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In this dream I was looking at a large drawing of a cartoon or comic strip. It took 2 pages of sheets of about 14x14 size. On the left page there was 1 large picture. On the right page there were several smaller pictures. It seems like I saw this cartoon early in the dream like it was the bulletin from a church. I was in my old childhood home bedroom seeing the cartoon. It seemed like I was getting dressed or ready to go somewhere, maybe to church. Another person came in the room and wanted to go with me to church.

Another scene: I was at this church which may have been the church I attended as a child. I was with a small group of people and we were trying to enter the church. We came to a wall, maybe stone, which had a ladder up the wall and I wondered if we were to climb that. There was also a stairway to the left of the ladder section. We decided to try that. We went up part-way and came to a place that opened up almost the size of a room. In this area there was a ramp way we started to take. It was made of stone. We soon realized it led out into the room a ways but no farther, so we backed up and took another stone pathway over to the right of the ramp way. It led us into the sanctuary. 

Inside the sanctuary we went up stairs and came to an area of seats. The seats were covered with pink cushioning. We found an empty area and sat there. It turned out that church had the same cartoon strip pictures in the bulletin as I had seen previously. They were using it for their church service. They had different people read the different roles in the cartoon. The 2 different roles were Baptist ways of saying things, then non-Baptist ways of saying them. I didn’t pay much attention to what was being read. It seemed like I couldn’t focus or concentrate on what was being read, but I was aware of it. It seemed like the people I came with to that church were not Baptist, but were of some other faith denomination. 

The comic strip pictures in the church bulletin represent those churches being similar to the real but not the real in a relationship with Christ. They represented showing a caricature of the life or relationship with Jesus, but not the real way. It almost mimicked the way or mimed the way. These were representing the past churches in my life before I came to CTC. I found the real relationship with Jesus much more outside the formal church—in a Christian camp setting, in books, in tapes, in conferences. The pink cushioned seats represented fleshly comfort. That’s what was offered in my previous churches. Stone represents witness, Word, testimony, but it can also represent false witness. There seemed to be various ways into the church service, and these were connected with stone, but it was hard to find a right way in. This dream seems to refer to past experiences since it had my childhood home and church in it. My sisters and I all came out of those same experiences and all are looking for what’s real – for a close relationship with God in the right way.

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What the Lord is showing me here is a self condition dream about my past experiences with churches and how they tried to represent a relationship with God, but did not give the real true representation of it. 

JOURNAL 6-7-05 Tuesday

A DREAM ABOUT FIXING A BED IN THE CHURCH
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In this dream P and I were trying to fix a bed. It seemed like the bed was at the church, but it also seemed that the bed was mine at the place where I had been sleeping, maybe also the church. He brought some bedclothes and I was trying to help make up the bed after I got up from sleeping.  P made a comment about a novel by Nicholas Sparks which indicated that he, P, had written the book. I planned to ask him later if he was Nicholas Sparks.

I especially was trying to get a nice pillow but the ones there seemed small and bunchy. I even tried to put two of them together to see if it would make a nice pillow.

P brought a bunch of Disney-like characters in small cutout plastic form and offered to let me pick one to keep. I picked one out, then found it was somewhat damaged, so I picked another, and that was also not quite right, so I picked a third time. That one was Eeyore.

I was trying to get dressed to go to work at the office and was late since I had taken so much time trying to get that bed fixed up right. I saw some ladies at the church having coffee/tea and realized they came later in the morning and that I was really late for work.

This is a now dream. This is a dream about you and about now in your life. I am the Pastor and you and I are making a place of rest and salvation in the church right now. I wrote THE BOOK on intimacy with Me. I put the words in that Book about being intimate with Me and close to Me. You are trying to fix a place (pillow) for your head/mind/thoughts to rest in Me. Within the Church there are characters that are plastic, are fake, are not real, but try to look real. As you saw in the dream, each one has some flaw or damage that made them not right. The ladies in the church drinking tea/coffee represent people having fellowship and talking and drinking together. Out of that some have refreshment and grace and others drink bitterness and envying. They are all together in the place called the church building, but they don’t all belong to Me. Being “late for work” refers to this being the latter part of your life, your work life. Even in this “late” time in your life you have work to do—work to help prepare things for rest and salvation for people. You may pray about that.

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What the Lord has shown me here is that right now I am working with Him to set up a place of rest and salvation, intimacy and peace, for people to meet Him. This may refer to the books He is having me write. I am to pray about this.

A PARABLE ABOUT A MAN WITH TWO HORSES
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I want you to come with Me now. Come to a listening place and write what I say.

This is a time of great turmoil and transition for the world and the Church. You will see many events take place which you will wonder about, and question, and be unhappy about…both in the world and in the church. Ask Me each time you have such a question, and I will answer you. Bring the question to this book and write it here. I will answer it and then others can read My answer too. Now let’s write another parable…

Once there was a man who had two horses. He didn’t need two for he only used one at a time, but he wanted to keep the second horse just in case he needed it. There was another man who didn’t have any horse and needed one horse badly. I wanted to bless the second man, but I also wanted to bless the first man with giving. How could I do that unless the first man listened to Me and followed My heart. Now what will happen to the second man if the first doesn’t give? They both will lose a blessing.

At times you are that first man, and at times you are that second man waiting for someone to share with you. If you see a need, ask Me if you are the person to help meet that need and how you are to do that—pray, give, listen, empathize, or what.

JOURNAL 6-8-05 Wednesday

A DREAM ABOUT SIGNS WITH A SPOT, A NAME, AND A VIOLET
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4:00 a.m. In this dream I saw a sign with words but I wasn’t sure what it said. I didn’t read the words. Another person made a gesture indicating the sign meant to shoot at it. The sign had a spot/button on it to indicate that.         ____________
                                                                                    [                       ]
                                         	                               [        *             ]
                                         	                               [___________ ]

5:00 a.m. Later I awoke from seeing a beautiful vivid purple flower like a violet in the air in front of my eyes…like it was a sign.

5:09 a.m. Later someone else said he saw a picture of a sign with a name on it.

The sign represents seeing directions that show you where to go and what to do. Shooting at a sign refers to sending words in that direction. A picture of a sign with a name on it refers to the direction I am giving to someone whose name you do not know, but someone else saw that name. I am the beautiful vivid purple flower and this shows Me as royal, majestic, noble and ruling with My glory. I give the directions and show you or others where to send words. I put the name on a sign for someone else to follow to come to you to help you with your needs. The directions are Mine and the glory is Mine.

So You’re sending words in the direction of the sign and to the person whose name is on the second sign? And that person is to help me with my needs? Are you speaking of financial/provision needs?

Yes. I am speaking, sending words, to someone specifically to help you with your needs. I do this through My glory which shows who I am.

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What the Lord has shown me here is that He is speaking to someone to help me with my provision and financial needs. This reveals His glory, who He is.

A PARABLE ABOUT A MAN WITH NO PLACE TO LIVE
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Once there was a man who had no place to live. He went from town to town looking for a place where he could stay and find a home. Finally he came to an old farmhouse on a plot of land with a barn and some other small buildings. He asked if he could stay in one of the outer small buildings, and the farmer said he could if he did some chores for him daily. The man agreed and made a home for himself in a small building outside the main house, and he helped the farmer with daily chores. Thus he finally had a home for him to live in.

The point of the story is that the man was looking for a home. He looked and looked for that home. The farmer let the man use something that actually belonged to the farmer. The man had to work for it, but he finally had a home. What is a home? It is a relationship with the heavenly Father. It is something man looks for, but often doesn’t even know where to look. He may spend years and years looking for this “home.” When he finally finds it, he moves in close to the Father and works with Him to complete the chores needed to be done on the earth. 

JOURNAL 6-9-05 Thursday

A DREAM ABOUT PAGES OF INSTRUCTIONS
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Several pages of instructions, typed out much earlier, were handed to me. I will be affected by them, by which one I pick, but I don’t understand why.

The Holy Spirit tells me this represents various “instructions” which will be given to me by different groups of people wanting me to do things for them (i.e. CTC, my family, etc.) I am to be very careful to take all such suggestions for use of my time to the Secret Place and get instruction from the Lord as to what He wants me to use this precious time for. An example of this happened yesterday when I was asked to be a greeter for the children’s conference at CTC which would have taken my regular writing time.

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What the Lord has shown me here is that I am and will be asked to do various things by different people and I am affected by which things I agree to do. I am to take all this to the Secret Place and get His instructions for the use of my time.

A DREAM ABOUT TWO ICE SKATERS
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I watched two ice skaters skating on a stage-like area. Watching them seemed to stir something within me.

Skating—speed, fast, swift advancement or progress, skillful

“For He will finish the work, and cut it short in righteousness; because a short [quick] work will the Lord make upon the earth.” (Romans 9:28)

Perhaps the two ice skaters represent the two aspects of what is taking place quickly in the world now—the culmination of the good, and the culmination of the bad. Watching it will surely stir something within me.

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What the Lord has shown me here is a picture of two things taking place in the world right now, the growth of His Kingdom, and the growth of the evil in the world. Both are going very fast and are very clearly in view, like on stage.